Inquisition! We have for you a list of nominees for your Satinalia Fools. We say Fools, plural, because we have many fine nominees and two crowns - we think they may be crowns. We removed them from the heads of statues in some temple or another. Perhaps they were symbols of shame rather than nobility? None of us is qualified to say, but the statues were very small compared to some others, and - [ an abrupt end to the rambling ] - we will assume they are close enough to crowns to crown Fools. Valentine has been testing them and looks very Foolish.

Two Fools, then. If they cannot cooperate we will give each one half of the courtyard during the festivities and they may, éventuellement, stage a battle between their kingdoms.

We have placed a box outside the tavern where you can place the name of the nominee you wish to support. Please only choose once. The Maker does not endorse cheating. If you do not believe in the Maker then whatever you do believe in likely does not endorse cheating, either, though, again, none of us is qualified to say. If you believe in a god that does endorse cheating, please find it in your own heart to practice restraint.

If you have any questions we are happy to answer them, of course! But first Freddie will read for you our list of nominees:

[ What follows are some remarks, prepared by all three of Our Heroes together but read in Freddie's sweet and perfect voice, concerning Adelaide, Alistair, Bruce, Iskandar, Raylan, Val, and Yvgni. ]

...hello.

[The voice that comes through the sending crystals is--well. He's clearly hesitant, for one, and its easy enough to tell that this particular person is not that all used to speaking at large. Not that speaking into a crystal counts as such, but. The effect is still there, knowing where these messages will go to.

The awkwardness lingers for a moment, but then Bruce clears his throat and speaks properly, this time.]

This is Bruce. [Pause.] And I have news to deliver for anyone who is familiar with Kain Highwind, the Rifter.

[Another pause, and a quiet breath, because no matter how many times he does this--delivering news such as this is never pleasant business.]

He is dead--killed in a fight against a desire demon and its companions. All the healers at the scene did whatever was possible to save him, but the wounds were too extensive for chance of a proper recovery. Kain Highwind passed away a warrior, fighting to his very last breath.

In his last words he sends his apologies and well wishes to everyone who knew him, and to not mourn his passing - these are the words I pass on now to those concerned. For those who knew him, he will be remembered in our hearts.

Thank you for listening.



[Private to the Advisors only]

[Switching over now, and in a quieter voice:]

To the advisors: I will send you a detailed report as soon as I am able to.

So, question time. I think it's finally time to get a tattoo, and I'm interested in references to a tattoo artist, if you know any. The closer to Skyhold the better...though actually, Antiva City would also do, because reasons. Anywhere within the Inquisition's reach is fine; I'm not in a huge rush, but...it's time, and I want to consider options.

Or you can just tell me about your tattoos and what meaning they have for you. I'm always interested in that sort of thing. If you're planning to get one, whether you have any now or not, that counts too.

Good evening, Skyhold. This is Senior Warden Teren von Skraedder, and I have conceded to use this blasted thing to inform you that I am the newly-appointed Warden liaison for the Inquisition.

Concerns and questions from or regarding Wardens in the context of the Inquisition should be directed to me. I would advise you not to waste my time with inane commentary, but I know who I'm representing and will simply remind you that I control the camp's whiskey rations.

All complaints from Alistair and Kaisa must be reported first to Anders, in observation of both punishing any remaining past misdeeds and in protecting my ears from their keening.

In addition, it would be remiss of me not to inform you that one of our own answered his Calling on our recent expedition to the Deep Roads. May each of us drink to Senior Warden Hercules Hansen tonight, who gave his life in sacrifice to the well-being of Thedas.

Thank you for your time.