(no subject)

[lyriumcarved]

FORM: Sending Crystal
SENDER: Fenris
RECIPIENT: Everyone!
WHAT: Itching and bitching. This is a serious complaint that must be addressed.
WHEN: Now-ish
WHERE: Kirkwall
NOTES: Full body tattoos are a bad idea, kids!

Apparently someone has seen fit to play a prank upon me. When I find out who's responsible, you will regret it... especially if it's you, Anders. [That agitated growl comes into his voice momentarily. Then there's a pause and a long sigh, followed by the sound of vigorous scratching. Though the latter is probably tricky to entirely guess at, it's at least apparent that he's doing something in the background.]

I thought we were all above such behavior. Unless someone can provide a better explanation for this...

[But he doesn't get to elaborate, as he's again too distracted by the incessant itching.]

Comments

[thunderproof]

...you okay there, buddy?

( do you need help... you sound like you need help? )

[lyriumcarved]

That's... [He makes a frustrated noise.] ...debatable.

[Though he assumes it to be nothing more than a prank, it sure is an irritating one.]

[thunderproof]

Well, okay, that's not great. What happened? Do you need help?

[lyriumcarved]

It's - [Annoyed noise.] - just this- [Even more annoyed noise.] -itching. It's unending. I've come across few things as irritating as this. I for one would like to determine the cause so I can... make it stop already.

[Well, there are maybe a couple of things this irritating, but they tend to come in the form of certain mages.]

[gatheringstorm]

A better explanation for what, now?

[lyriumcarved]

For whatever has caused this itching. Fasta vass... it's unending.

[And it seems to have spread more over time, which is just lovely. Ugh.]

[gatheringstorm]

[...there's a joke she could make about the itching, but Korrin decides against it. You're welcome, Fenris.]

What, you think someone dumped itching powder on your bed or something? I don't know anyone stupid enough to piss you off like that. Sure it wasn't coming into contact with something by accident?

[lyriumcarved]

[That's for the best, this is definitely no real good time for joking at him. He has a better sense of humor than most may realize, but there are limits.]

It's the first explanation I could come up with. It's not as if... [He pauses, trying to get at an especially annoying area on his back. Ahhhh... got it, that's good... He lets out a sigh of relief.] ...as if I've encountered anything unusual recently to cause it. Unless there's some foul magic at work. I haven't ruled out that possibility.

[serannas]

Um, I think you'll have to let us in on what's happening first? What's that sound?

[lyriumcarved]

It's the sound of an unwanted aftermath. [A sound which soon enough carries on happening.] Or scratching, feel free to take your pick.

[serannas]

Oh, well have you tried soaking in a bath? Maybe you just have really dry skin because of the winter air?

[meds4sale]

What are the symptoms?

[lyriumcarved]

You make it sound as if I'm afflicted with some disease. [It's far more ridiculous than that, or so he thinks. Or wants to think. He needs it to not be something magical at work. The brands haven't started to show much change at the moment yet, though, so he doubts it's too serious.] It's an unexplained itching, if you're that curious.

[meds4sale]

I have treated many ailments that involve unexpected itching.

A rash, perhaps?


Have you run afoul of any peculiar plants recently?

[sunshinethroughgrey]

Fenris, where are you, so I can get you to a healer?

[She knew he was fairly well along if he was finally asking for help.]

[lyriumcarved]

[The itching sure has put him in a foul mood, and it definitely has pushed him over the edge. He just needs it to stop, at this point.]

I'm at the mansion. If you had anything that could alleviate this itching- [Scraaaaatch, ah sweet, temporary relief.] -I would be grateful.

[sunshinethroughgrey]

[She can tell, the way he is snarling. Her tone is calm, but not soothing. Fenris always appreciates people being straight forward.]

I will see what I have at our home, but we might have to go to the Gallows if it's that serious. I'm on my way.

[unshadowing]

[...what even is this.]

Do I even want to ask?

[lyriumcarved]

No, you really don't.

[He grumbles a few annoyed Tevene phrases under his breath, as the itching just keeps on coming.]

[unshadowing]

...what are you scratching at? [Because that's definitely what it sounds like.] Is it - I thought your markings hurt. Never heard of them making you itch.

[wickedchase]

I'd like to think someone could do better than itching. What a poor prank indeed.

[lyriumcarved]

It would be rather pathetic, but I wouldn't put it past some people.

[Still, it was just one conclusion that he'd jumped to in his desperation to see this resolved. Too bad it seems it's probably something a little less obvious than that.]

I can't even begin to guess at the possible cause, otherwise, though.

[justice_is_blond]

What, you're still here? I thought you'd drunkenly wandered off months ago.

[He sounds a little amused.]

...If there's a rash accompanying the scratching I'm hearing, you may want to reconsider being so intimate with your own hand.

[lyriumcarved]

Why does everything you say have to be so utterly unhelpful?

[He growls under his breath as a particularly annoying itch catches him off guard. And it's on his back. In one of those spots that requires a bit of contortion to get it. He's having so much fun...]

At least this eliminates the prank theory. I'd like to think even you could manage something more sophisticated than this.

[justice_is_blond]

Because you bring me up in a public message as if I've the time to prank you. There's no motivation to help you when I've serious matters to attend to and you're griping as usual.

[There's a pause anyway.]

Did you catch it down by the docks?