The age-old question

[issala]

FORM: Sending Crystal
SENDER: Kas
RECIPIENT: Everyone
WHAT: More questions
WHEN: Today
WHERE: Skyhold
NOTES: Tiny teen qunari muses about not being tiny any more.

So at what age are you really an adult? I mean, not maturely but like... to other people. You say you 'come of age' and stuff like that but exactly what age is that in Ferelden? Here you can't join the army if you're under seventeen, which is fair. Does that mean you're an adult after seventeen?

I heard some rifter saying you can't drink unless you're eighteen or twenty-one or whatever. Rivain doesn't have a rule like that. I had wine when I was a kid, so I don't see the point of restricting it.

...but, like... at what age are you an adult? How old do you gotta be to marry someone without it being weird?

[Pause.]

Not that I'm marrying anyone!

Comments

[gatheringstorm]

You sure about that? Don't have your eye on anyone at all?

[Okay, okay, she's just teasing. Chill, Kas.]

What kind of nonsense rule is that, about drinking? How are you supposed to gain any kind of tolerance if you wait until later? That just sounds messed up.

[issala]

There are no girls my age Korrin. We better save the fucking world already or I'll die an unkissed man.

[Sob, his hormones.]

I dunno what it was about. It seemed weird anyway. I mean, what are you gonna give a teething baby to suck on to numb shit if you're not a mage and can't use booze?

[circleprodigy]

I was raised in a Circle, not Ferelden at large, but seventeen as the age of adulthood seems right to me. As for marriage, I see it as more common in one's twenties or beyond than otherwise. Perhaps this is due to practicalities? It takes time to gather the resources for married life, I assume.

[issala]

I suppose that makes sense, yeah. You need a house and a job and stuff... unless you have a family with those things that don't mind sharing.

[byblow]

Anyone more than ten years younger than me is a child.

[issala]

Great. So everyone in Skyhold.

[limier]

I would have been wed at seventeen. Where I'm from, it’s a common enough age for contracts.

However, I suspect that it is always somewhat weird. Such is the nature of lifelong, binding oaths.

[issala]

I more mean... weird like marrying off kids. I mean, where's that line?

[alankazam]

When you stop asking yourself if you are.

[issala]

Dammit.

[blightedson]

I don't think this is something that has a clear answer. It depends on what you feel.

[issala]

You think so?

[arlathvhen]

According to the Dalish, you become an adult after you get your vallaslin, provided that you can do it without making any noise. Usually...you've managed to complete your apprenticeship as well. For hunters, it's killing an animal of the forest.

[ Or sometimes a human. Close enough. ]

[issala]

...but when do they know what age it is, though?

'Cuz I'm pretty sure some kids can kill a deer but will cry when you cut their face, and some kids can't kill any game but will not say a word when you take their fingers off.

[foxsays]

I left home at fifteen to live by myself and provide for myself, it's more or less the age a lot of us do that back home if we're not rich or noble. Maybe younger if you're apprenticed and go live by them or go to sea.

[But she was thieving and parkouring from twelve so maybe Araceli is an outlier here.]

Who has rules about drinking? Everyone drinks watered rum more than they drink water in Castileos.

[issala]

So taking care of yourself would be a good rule for when you're an adult, then?

[He sounds thoughful.]

...I had to take care of myself after I got here to Ferelden, but I still felt a lot like a kid.

...and I know, right!

[justice_is_blond]

I believe you're an adult when you get to the point that you've so many responsibilities you find yourself wishing you were a child again.

[issala]

Huh. What if you always had a lot of responsibilities, though?

[blessedmaiden]

I think age is somehow irrelevant: some children can be more mature than adults and some 'adults' can be rather... childish.

On the marriage department... relationships are huge commitments, they're really complicated stuff- and I don't honestly think I can help you with that. One question, thought: weird for the others or weird for you?

[issala]

I can understand that. I mean, look at the guy and his babbling about Chantry sisters.

I guess weird for a society in general? I mean, there wasn't really any marrying in the kith where I grew up. People just slept together and had kids anyway. I mean more of a... marrying people off when they're still seen as kids. Where's the line?

[provenforce]

I've heard of slave girls being married as young as eight or nine, and that's considered normal. I don't know that that's a good basis on adulthood.

[issala]

...that's gross. Poor girls.

[not_the_question]

I used to think I was an adult at one-hundred. Then I thought I was at one-thousand.

Now that I'm a great deal older than either of those two, I realise it doesn't matter at all.

[But then, being half the age of the universe does tend to give one some strange perspectives.]

Ultimately, you only need to know that it's ridiculous to grow up, if you can't be childish sometimes.

[issala]

One-thousand? A great deal older?

...do the healers know you're out of bed?

[in_death_sacrifice]

It's difficult to say when adulthood truly starts. I joined the Wardens at age eighteen, though by then I'd already seen quite a few battles already. Your first time in combat certainly makes a man out of you... though that age can obviously vary.

Marriage can happen in the teenage years, though it seems more common into the twenties. It all depends, sometimes nobles decide to marry off their children young for some political reason. It doesn't always happen, but it can.

[issala]

I've killed twelve people so far with the Inquisition and I don't really know if that makes me an adult or just not dead.

[He does keep count, however.]

It sounds really sketchy for nobles to marry off young people but at least they're around the same age? It's really sketchy when it's a young person and an older one.

[meds4sale]

Many, many factors.

Some you may find apply... some you may not.

Reaching a certain age, shouldering new responsibilities, or going through a rite of passage - it's all a matter of perspective.

What is yours, may I ask you?

[issala]

I just turned eighteen the other day.

[thehiddenking]

For the Elves of Arda, we do not come of age until we reach our one hundredth year. I cannot speak for the races of this world, but I think it must be much sooner for them for they do not live nearly as long.

[issala]

What is it with you Rifters and being insanely old??