therookery | [ OPEN ] Inquisition's Hot or Hot DAMN

FORM:Sending Crystal / Posted copy to the bulletin board
SENDER: Zevran Arainai
RECIPIENT: All
WHAT: The Inquisition is full of stupidly pretty people. This bears discussing.
WHEN: Current
WHERE: Skyhold
NOTES: Respectful oogling, language, and adult content.

I think the time has come to ask a very serious question of the Inquisition. Is it just me or is Skyhold full to bursting with ridiculously sexy individuals? We have statuesque Qunari, lithe Dalish, voluptuous Dwarves, Humans in every glorious shade, size, and shape- and every last one of them incredibly attractive. I had thought to myself- 'Zevran, the Inquisition must be turning away those with less than appealing faces' but no. Handsome men and gorgeous women all. I have tried to list out names and rate them but, alas, there are too many even for I to form an opinion.

Too many gorgeous people. Is that not a marvelous problem to have?

And so I turn to you, my fellow members of the Inquisition. I ask for your aid because I simply cannot keep up with all the lovely people on my own. From a scale of "I would have them tomorrow" to "I would have them right now", how would you rate the beautiful people of Skyhold?

In the interest of fairness- if you name a name? You must list what of them you find terribly attractive- what of them drives you to the point of distraction. I shall go first!

Dorian Pavus - If there is anyone here that might, and I do mean might possibly be prettier than me? It is Dorian. Have you seen him? How can anyone look upon that man and not be at least a little enchanted, if not enthralled? Those smoldering eyes, that sultry voice, the teasing mustache; he I would have right now should he wish.

Merrill - What can I say? She is an utter delight in every possible way- fine boned and sweet, under that innocent smile I promise there is a terribly naughty mind just waiting to be unleashed. Her as well I would have in a heartbeat were I not afraid for my life due to the protective nature of some of her friends.

Knight-Captain Maria - The allure of a dutiful woman is beyond measuring. Her skill in battle, that wry humor, her devotion- I am certain under that templar armor there is a body that would bring many a man and woman to their knees in worship. She? I would have in an hour as I am certain it would take that long to get her out of the armor.

Taashath - I would climb the man like a tree- I have climbed the man like a tree. Those broad shoulders, that rack, his voice, the way his muscles ripple- Maker just recounting the things of him that I find alluring has me a little distracted, I apologize. Reshaping the friendly shores indeed. There is a delightful danger to him- and as such I would have him within an hour, for being made ready takes about that long.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Honestly it's probably Purrelden who needs to protect me from you.

And you just called your tent a lair. What diabolical things are you planning to make me blush?

It's where I remove clothing. Like socks. I hear some people are absolutely entranced by the sight of ankles; I hope they're not too much for your eyes.

[A surprised and amused snort by that answer.]

I'm pretty sure I'll be perfectly alright at the sight of your ankles, Anders.

If you're certain. Also, I'd ask Nate-Nathaniel about Purrelden. She can be very dangerous when she chooses to be.

I am but I'll be sure to keep my eyes averted just in case.

I haven't met Nathaniel I don't think. I'm also used to small and dangerous.

You should meet him. He's one of the best people I've ever known.

One of the best huh? What's he like?

Kind, intelligent, resourceful, brave, grumpy.

Grumpy huh? Like just once in a while or the kind where it's an ongoing thing?

Ongoing, but not in a bad way.

I'm guessing you rather like him being grumpy.

I'd not share a tent with the man if I didn't.

You share a tent? Well he must love it when you try showing you ankles to him.

I should try that. Perhaps to curry favor the next time I stick the cat on him while he's snoring.

Wow, I wonder why he's grumpy.

It is the greatest mystery in my life.

What, not that he stills shares a tent with you even after you put a cat on him?

You don't like having cats put on you? That seems exceedingly heartless.

Besides, who wouldn't keep a healer around when they've a habit of getting hurt?

Actually I've never had a cat put on me so I wouldn't know.

Keeping you around doesn't mean he has to share a tent, but you do have a point. That is a pretty good match there.

Perhaps one day this will change. The cat put on you, not the sharing a tent. I don't need a crowd in here.

Having a cat put on me, only then I will know true happiness?

Sounds like you need a bigger tent.

Yes, and no. I like a little privacy, and two people fit this tent nicely. I do not need bigger, I do not need smaller. This is good.

Just enough space to spread out, right?

You could say that.

Hey, as long as you feel comfortable and have the space you require. That's what's important.

(no subject)

justice_is_blond - 2016-05-02 05:34 (UTC) - Expand

el_tybs - 2016-05-02 05:38 (UTC) - Expand