I'm in need of some assistance with a Sashamiri matter. Any division will do, so long as you can read Trade and are a relatively patient person. Any dragon-related knowledge is a bonus, though not required.

Alternatively, I'm open to suggestions for how to break up a tedious task such that you're not reduced to wanting to strangle the person who made the task necessary.

[His tone is light enough that it's clear no one is actually in danger of strangulation. So far.]

Surely you all have better things to do than pass notes all day.

Hello. This is-- Seneschal Salvio Pizzicagnolo. Seneschal, to Riftwatch. And as we are all aware--by orders that have likely been handed out or communicated--Provisional Viscount Bran has requested the assistance of Riftwatch in the Vinmark mountains, to address--requests for aid, and other matters. And of course, this is--well, as seneschal, I should like to stress on, um, behalf of Riftwatch, as an organization--what an opportunity this is. For us. It is a sign of our legitimacy and... well, a show of good faith, that the Provisional Viscount should call upon us for aid. I would ask, again, on behalf of Riftwatch and from my position as seneschal, not--personally, of course--um, I would ask that this be borne in mind as we organize and answer this call.

Um. Forms for requisitions, especially for supplies required for missions in the temperatures and climates typical of the Vinmark--well, they are, as ever, available in the Base Operations office. Uh, and, and there will be temporary offices for Base Operations at our--temporary accommodations. Requisitions requested there will be filled in as timely a manner as possible.

Er, but that is all--procedural, of course, and not entirely what... Well, um, it is my understanding from the Provisional Viscount's correspondence, that we can expect to find a herd of Vinmark Goats for our use. They have been left without a, uh, without much in the way of staff, and will need to be rounded up, but--well, it is generous, to have given for our use. I, well, I myself am somewhat of an... well, I have experience with goats. And goat-herding, and-- [Being herded by goats, he doesn't confess that, nearly does but doesn't] --um, their care, and so on. I am sending along the necessary rations of minerals for their diet. It is important.

And of course, that's-- well, if there is any trouble with them, I should be glad to--to volunteer my aid. Remotely. Um, and--and, to that end, if there are any among us with skills, particular, to the region, and its challenges--of course, please, speak to them, or perhaps--write them down? And we will circulate these writings and advice. I am myself working on a sort of-- well, a sort of goat. Pamphlet. That might be used. So--

Um, yes. That will be all. Thank you.

So...hello. I realise there are plenty of rifters here as well as those who might have experience with this subject I'll be bringing up today but mostly in a more hands-on way.  And the subject matter is one where people experience fear - bordering on irrational, honestly - to revulsion, hatred, a whole variety of emotions honestly.  

Which stems from a sad lack of knowledge; giant spiders, you see, don't need to be thought of that way which is why I'll be conducting a dissection of one over the sending crystal.  If you'd rather not listen?  Then turn off your sending crystal, please don't complain to me, the spider died for knowledge and I'm sure most of you have killed many more for far less noble reasons.  [How many ruins have been plundered, nests disturbed?  That is spider gold you brigands, how else does their economy flourish?]

Anyway, I'm not about to go over the history of spiders in Thedas unless you specifically request that, plenty of books exist in the library here and some are even well-written on this very subject but if you head out by Sundermount you'll doubtless have a run-in with the sort of specimen I have before me now: far larger than other spiders but still in possession of eight legs as all spiders should be and eight eyes.  A theory regarding the large size of this specimen - if you want to see one up close safely please let me know, she's a beauty - is down to the Veil but again, please turn to your books or I can answer questions after but there are a lot of theories.  Some say the dwarves even bred them too but I never did get any answers in my time researching in Orzammar.

So.  Females are generally larger than males, same as you'd see with dragons likely due to the number of young that get produced, and there are differences by the face if you're close enough to take those facts in: male palps have a different shape to female palps due to reproduction.  Now [there is a distinct cracking noise and then a wet rushing, a gooshing if you will (technical term)] for the internal anatomy...and perhaps corrupted spiders since spiders, like wolves and bears, can also be impacted by Darkspawn and proximity to Blighted places!

[Again with the throat clearing.] Mhavos Dalat, a pleasure.

To those of you who inquired, last time, to the state of the magical artifact storage, specifically the 'most interesting' item: I am now sitting next to a skull-- sans jar-- with what I thought was an ancient rune etched into its dome, but now believe to be a carefully calligraphied profanity. Or perhaps it's more of a suggestion.

Another matter, if you have a moment. I was recently reading a book with something in it that caused me to fall from my chair. I could suspect a magical prank, or the early signs of dementia. As I'm not one to cast aspersions on my colleagues, I'll suggest the latter.

I am curious, however. How many things are in this library that are actually relevant to this organization? Yes, I am talking about the collection of limericks someone slipped into the... cookbook. This is a cookbook. It has the cover of a Chantry history, and... nevermind.

[The sound of pages turning, books being pulled from shelves.]

In other volumes, some of which should even be here, I have found several pressed flowers... which I could complain about, but are honestly quite lovely. There is also illegible marginalia, notes on political and social bias (if you are the one leaving these, please inquire within), and a tome on the Fade that... drips. And smells. I've honestly been afraid to open it before now, but-

[A wet thump. Some choice swearing in Orlesian. A lot of coughing.]

Riftwatch then-- I'd wonder if you'd do me the great honour or the courtesy or however you deem fit to judge it, that's not for me to decide to tell me about the most interesting creatures you've come across in your travels.

Not your fellows. They're hardly interesting, not to me at any rate.

And it doesn't have to be with Riftwatch though before and after the appearance of the rifts helps greatly! Their behaviours, appearance, anything you'd care to share would be tremendously appreciated. Also if it was around the time of the last Blight would help too or if they were close to Darkspawn or the Deep Roads, I mean if you give me an accurate enough date and place I can narrow that down but I'm interested in your tellings of it!

Oh and I'm Octavian Nestor Sokolov, but do please just call me Tavin I'll be-- well I'll probably be in the library if you've anything that's better in person. Sketches, samples, oh or any injuries inflicted that sort of thing, some of those are best seen rather than heard.