therookery | Griffon gripes

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Griffon gripes

FORM: Sending crystal
SENDER: Freddie, Val, and Jehan (your favorites!)
RECIPIENT: Everyone
WHAT: A Griffon Grievance
WHEN: Now
WHERE: Everywhere
NOTES: Can we say a group of griffons is called a grievance? A grievance of griffons?

Inquisition.

[This is Val. Don’t stop listening, his tone is grave and serious, which means what follows will be equally grave and serious.]

When one thinks of the noblest of creatures, beasts of the air, one must first and always think of griffons. The dragon, she has a certain unspeakable loveliness, a loveliness of her form, in all her savage glory, but if the word to meditate upon is nobility, then it is the griffon that comes first to mind. On this, we can all agree, yes?

So, then, tell to me: why complain about the smell? [ Because it is terrible! another accented voice says in the background, muffled. ] Yes, it is a pungent aroma. But nobly so. Less noble and far more worthy of complaint is the habit of the griffon of which books do not speak of: the habit of airborne thievery.

A whole ham, Inquisition.

[ Jeannot—who had his despondent face buried in a pillow, before this point—lifts his head to chime in. ]

A good ham. It tasted of hope. Or I imagine that it must have, before it was swallowed whole by a beast who did not even pause to appreciate it.

We ought to have been warned. And another thing—

And another thing! [ It's Freddie now, talking over Jehan, feel free to begin paying attention again. She sounds incensed, but also like she's probably putting it on a bit. ] Hair ribbons! If the beasts want my last good set of silk hair ribbons I would be more than happy to donate them to the cause of brightening up the horribly dull colors you chose for their tack, but I won't have them eaten! It shows an appalling lack of taste which would never have happened if these fine Orlesian creatures had been properly raised.

Perhaps it is not the tack that is the problem? Perhaps it is the color of the griffons themselves. The horrible grays, and duns - the griffons are surely desperate. I would be. Can you dye the feathers, do you think?

—I was going to say, [ Jehan continues, ] I think we are owed an explanation, as academics, for this reemergence of an extinct species. As well as a new ham. If we are given these things then perhaps we can offer ribbons and dye.

And if we offer these griffons ribbons, and dye, and perhaps the smallest piece of our ham - I will take the cut, my friends - perhaps then the griffons will find themselves more kindly disposed to us. And by us I mean me. [If Val sounds a little sulky, that’s because he is.] What an unkindness. I will stoop to bribery if I must, griffons.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Probably, yet there are many differents way to communicate with species who do not speak our language or don't have a real concept of 'talking'. Maybe you could try to paint yourself around them and see if they show interest or something like this...

And that's a... good thing, they have personalities and they're allies, not servants. I'm not too fond of this whole concept of 'taming' creatures so they'll obey your orders. Even if it's common in my world as well...

[She chuckles.]

Paint myself? There's an image. But I suppose it has more promise than bringing Garahel with me. He's very enthusiastic and affectionate...and I'm not certain the griffons will appreciate that.

Would you like to give it a try? I'm sure you'd look wonderful with some blue stripes to let others know 'Hey, I'm the lady of Ice and I'm here to kick your ass'. And... it may end up being a disaster but it could be entertaining to see Garahel trying to greet them.

Still, doesn't sound like a good idea.

Perhaps I shall, at some point. Or we can talk Kain into making the attempt for us. He's very enthusiastic about anything griffon-related.

I actually like the idea, let's paint him, I bet he'd look lovely with his pretty blond hair dyed purple or some other bright color. And I'd rather see him being chased by griffons than a mabari.

[She laughs softly at that.]

It could match his nails. He's not very Orlesian in some ways, but in that...I suppose some habits are hard to break.

[Rydia shrughs, she can't even cment on that because WHAT CREATURE ISN'T PROUD OF THEIR FANGS?]

That sounds perfect... just make sure you don't pick purle, we shoud have different colors for his nails, hair and body paint. I mean, I'm not even sure if griffons can actually see colors but if we're planning to send him in we better make sure he's suited for success.

A fair point. I'm not certain how much color they can see, but it would be worth finding out, for more than just amusements' sake. We'll need them on missions, after all.

Right, having a specific color maybe associated you your allies may allow them to charge more easily in the front lines. Actually... how do you ask animals how many colors they can see?

You're going to... paint me?

[Wait, why is this happening, exactly???]

[Wait, she wasn't being serious here... oh, well, who cares!]

Of course! You'd look handsome covered in war paint! Do you want to come over an give it a try? I'm sure your friend has some paint she can offer us...

I can't deny that I like the sound of war paint. But I don't really want to look foolish... I want to look fierce and intimidating.

[He's Orlesian and he grew up a noble, so he knows foolish fashion when he sees it, ok.]

I'm sure we can work on that. Pick a color, Kain, and we'll see what we can come up with! Also... what are your opinions on lipstick?

[She knows they're all the rage between Baron warriors but in this world she's barely seen anyone using them... weird, lipstick is so fierce-looking...]

Dark blue, or black. Could those work?

I don't mind lipstick, I've worn it on many occasions, though I don't as much, lately. It's tradition among Orlesian nobles, you see. The most I do now is paint my nails.

[Don't judge, all of this is MANLY by Orlesian standards.]

They sound perfect... let me find some good paints and we'll get to it, mh?

Oh, I see... well, it's often used by warriors, the hero who saved our world seems quite fond of blue and purple lipstick himself, so I think it could make a nice addition?

[HEY, she's the one with permanent lipstick- I mean, green lips, here, who is she to complain?]

Let me guess... you'd like a 'scales and fangs' theme, wouldn't you?

I can't believe I'm agreeing to this, but very well, so be it. Go ahead and find those paints, I'll... be willing to see what may happen.

Hm, the warriors of your world would fit in very well in Orlais. Did... your friend, the other Kain, wear such makeup as well?

[It'll be another odd little quirk they apparently have in common. Though Kain here won't necessarily go as far as many of his fellow Orlesian nobles back home, not these days. Still, a little something here and there is fine to him.]

Scales and fangs would be wonderful. Yes, I'd like that a great deal.

This is going to be so fun!!! [Ohohoh, she's so excited right now! Thanks for accepting to be her doll, Kain!] Don't worry, you'll look fierce and scary!

Maybe- yet again I'e seen only the military department of Baron using certain things, other countries have different costumes. Like pants with smiley faces on as your only armor, those are the monks for you.

[Then again, she appreciates the sight of monks. Beautiful muscles, well trained bodies, splendid and glorious mustaches... aaah. Anywya, it doesn't matter, right?]

Okay. Face only or full body?

Good, I would accept nothing else than to be scary and fierce. [He really does prefer overall to be intimidating and tough, like a dragon himself. He thinks that Rydia understands this really well about him. It used to be weird, but now he... kind of likes that this rifter woman has figured out so much about him.]

Pants... with smiley faces? And these months are taken seriously? I'm actually surprised the Orlesian nobles haven't adopted anything like that... maybe it's only a matter of time.

[He considers that a moment. When she says 'whole body', what does she mean, he wonders.] Why don't we... just start with the face and see how that looks, first.

That's nice, I can't wait to work on it!

Their king, Yang, helped save the world twice. His daughter? Once. His wife's frying pans and ladles are feared all around the planet and no one would ever question their strenght, determination and devotion to the cause.

They don't need to appear menacing to let others know they're incredible fighters, trust me!

Yang also has the most majestic mustache in human history, it's worth mentioning it..

[And they're muscular, splendid men but shhh, that's not something she wants to comment on.]

Too bad,I hoped I could add feathers to the complex but... let's start with the face!

[She doesn't mean naked, man! She wouldn't mind, perhaps, because nudity is irrelevant to her but her whole idea included pants, paint on the legs and the torso and probably some kind of decorative gauntlet with fangs...]

As long as they have the skills, then... you're right, it hardly matters what they look like. Even if I personally prefer to look more intimidating. Hm, though that's a new one, using kitchen implements as weapons...

[He can respect that other worlds really do have some strange customs, sometimes, but they seem to still work for those who live there, anyway.]

I can't wait to see what you come up with. I... probably wouldn't mind trying out more after that, so perhaps we could try it. I'd really enjoy the feathers, too.

[It'd mean looking more griffon-like, which is something he'd enjoy.]

Whatever you prefere, my child, I will make sure you look as intimidating as a... what is an incredibly fierce beast of this world again? Anyway, while I personally don't care I can see why some want to look intimidating and cool.

Give me some time and I will have a design ready! And I will then try to make sure I can include feathers too, maybe with an headpiece...

A dragon. I for one would like to be as intimidating as a dragon, though a griffon is always worthy as well. I'm glad you understand why it's important to me.

[No matter what world he's on, Kain really does enjoy being intimidating and tough overall.]

Thank you... I think this sounds great. I'd like the headpiece a great deal.

[It appeals to his Orlesian fashion sense, but also to his need to look like a fierce creature of the air.]

I will be frank, my dear, it's difficult to look as majestic and intimidating as a dragon but I will do the best. Uhn... maybe I could try to imagine something like a mix of the two creatures... there's hardly anything more intimidating than chimeras.

[That wouldn't be such a terrible idea....]

Headpiece with feathers and I will think about the rest. Get ready for a proper battle makeup!

I trust in you to do your best. [She always looks so otherworldly in her own outfits that he looks forward to seeing what else she might come up with for him.] I'd never heard of a combination before, but I'd like to see how that comes together...

All right. I can't wait to see the result. I appreciate you for doing this.

Well, if some lizards can be covered in plumes, I'm sure dragons can too. You know, there are old old creatures in my world that say birds and lizards have common ancestors, I'm sure a mix of the two will look glorious.

And now I can't take the idea of a fluffy-plumey dragon out of my head. eh...

Oh, no no, I thank you, you have no idea how bored I get here...

Griffon gripes

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