therookery | crystal.

FORM: Crystal
SENDER: Alistair
RECIPIENT: Everyone around the Gallows
WHAT: A survey
WHEN: Nowish
NOTES: This is only partly my fault

[ Let it be said that Alistair has backed down from all manner of challenges and dares and weird games of chicken, if they were stupid and he wasn't in the mood, but also let it be said that he hasn't backed down from this specific one. ]

I know we're all very busy preventing the world from ending, but if I could have a moment of your time for some important questions—

First, I need to know what sorts of things you consider good-looking, in a man, generally speaking. It doesn't matter if you're attracted to men or not, before anyone feels the need to explain their love lives to me. I only need to know what sort of man-faces you think are pleasant.

And then I need to know if you think Byerly Rutyer is good looking enough to make up for not being a nice man.

And he'd also like to know how much money each of you have. I think that's important for you to know before you answer the nice man part.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

And absolutely none of what I am yours.

Yes, yes, very impressive, you're perfectly independent and have no time for my tomfoolery. Noted. Do you really think I'm not handsome?

I'm sure there are plenty of people in the world who like that sort of thing.

You're trying to injure me. Why would you try to injure me?

I don't think it's very injurious that I don't personally find you appealing. 'Man-faces I think pleasant' do not include 'ones that suggest my lord's fondness to have been vaguely narcissistic'.

Come now. Your lord's fondness was engendered by a combination of my charm and his charitable spirit.

Well, I don't like to speak on things I don't know.

Surely he spoke of me.

Quite possibly.

( it isn't even a byerly-particular implication, that she wasn't listening. she just often wasn't. )

Ugh. You're utterly destroying me, Gwenaelle. You know I hunger for nothing like I hunger for gossip about me.

He must have spoken of you, I did recognise the name.

But that doesn't do me any good. As penance, you must gossip about me to someone.

I spoke to Alexandrie about you immediately, so I'll consider my conscience clear.

Ahhh. What did you say?

Nothing flattering.

I should hope not!

You may rest assured.

What did you talk about? My face? My personality? My sordid reputation?

Your decency.

( it sounds like a joke. )

My decency.

[ He sounds massively happy. ]

Let me speculate. You heard me speak - realized I was a scoundrel - and questioned Alexandrie on why she would ever have been entangled with a wretch like me.

I've been in the bed she's in, I can guess.

( primly. )

But I consider her in all ways a more reliable source than some old drunk. I consulted her opinion.

[ Hey. ]

Hardly old. I'm not even a decade your senior. In any case, you oughtn't have consulted her.

I didn't mean you.

[ Oh. ]

Well - good.

How old are you?

(no subject)

bouchonne - 2018-10-22 20:50 (UTC) - Expand