crystal.

[byblow]

FORM: Crystal
SENDER: Alistair
RECIPIENT: Everyone around the Gallows
WHAT: A survey
WHEN: Nowish
NOTES: This is only partly my fault

[ Let it be said that Alistair has backed down from all manner of challenges and dares and weird games of chicken, if they were stupid and he wasn't in the mood, but also let it be said that he hasn't backed down from this specific one. ]

I know we're all very busy preventing the world from ending, but if I could have a moment of your time for some important questions—

First, I need to know what sorts of things you consider good-looking, in a man, generally speaking. It doesn't matter if you're attracted to men or not, before anyone feels the need to explain their love lives to me. I only need to know what sort of man-faces you think are pleasant.

And then I need to know if you think Byerly Rutyer is good looking enough to make up for not being a nice man.

And he'd also like to know how much money each of you have. I think that's important for you to know before you answer the nice man part.

Comments

[indissection]

I've found that there's nothing objectionable with Byerly's appearance. He's pleasant enough to look at.

[bouchonne]

Also, since he rudely declined to include it: do you think that Alistair is good-looking enough to make up for his general...mien.

[heirring]

[A single, deeply emphatic UGH!]

[byblow]

That wasn't one of the questions.

[byblow]

I agree.

[ Wait. ]

I think.

[ Is that ugh for him or for Rutyer. ]

Maybe.

[byblow]

I'll answer: I'm not.

[indissection]

You asked if I thought he was good looking enough to make up for, supposedly, being the opposite of nice. I think he is not objectionable - isn't that an answer? [ But, well - ] I think he is handsome enough to overlook some less savoury characteristics.

[byblow]

Thank you.

[ For answering the question. Even though her answer is INCORRECT. ]

What about the first and third questions?

[indissection]

Byerly already knows the answer to the third.

[ Don't be sour, Alistair. ]

A strong jaw and good eyebrows.

[coquettish_trees]

[ lightly: ]

If I admit to preferring man-faces with the sort of set that comes from sometime being obliged to dip into being unkind, would that answer your second question as well?

[bouchonne]

Yes you are! That nose! Those cheekbones!

[heirring]

His face is perfectly fine. And he's quite tall and dark haired which I'm sure lots of people might find pleasant. And if you like dark eyes, then I might see the appeal.

But really, men's faces should never be their best quality. It makes them intolerable.

[coppelganger]

I don't know the guy you're talking about, but no, having a pretty face doesn't make up for having a shit personality.

[coquettish_trees]

Oh, well said!

[heirring]

Oh Alexandrie, you don't.

[Tragedy! Disgrace! Horror!]

[coquettish_trees]

[ a dramatic and winsome sigh, as if she is holding up this awful flaw even now to observe it. ]

Ah, but I do.

private;

[heirring]

[This is clearly too mortifying a truth to discuss in public.]

Say it isn't so! Or say that he's seduced you terribly against your best judgement. Or that it is an old affection you had before he became the way he is now and you now have some old reserve of fondness and nothing more. He mentioned you had been friends. Are friends--

[A horrified gasp.]

You aren't presently involved, are you?

[byblow]

Are you personally in possession of a strong jaw and good eyebrows?

[indissection]

I would like to think my jaw can carry its weight.

[byblow]

I know what I look like. But it doesn't make up for anything.

[shri]

[ what's this? An invitation to drag Byerly for ten minutes? ]

A man without a beard is hardly a man at all, and little above a boy. How anyone could be attracted to someone without one is beyond me. If he has one, it should be well taken care of, as should all of him. His clothes should be neat, his hair taken care of. His breath should be sweet and I would prefer him articulate. Due to my own inclinations, he should be a warrior and possessing of a deep sense of honour. Nice matters only half as much as that.

[ and because she knows he's a little rat bastard that is working out how to use this information. ] For whatever boxes Rutyer might tick, he's an utter scounderal otherwise. Also, he seems immune to wear his clothes properly. It's distracting, like watching a child that hasn't learned to tie his laces properly.

[ ahem. ] - I've also been very rich and very poor. I am a rifter of modest means, at present.

[byblow]

Intolerable.

—are you getting all this down, Rutyer?

[ Since he's meant to be taking notes. ]

private~

[coquettish_trees]

[ her laughter is delighted and indulgent — Wysteria, you are simply too sweet. ]

We do have a bit of sordid history, Byerly and I. But no, not presently. Or, at least, not with him.

On that front it is worth noting that scions of Tevinter often have cause to dip into unkindness, and that I am surpassingly fond of Lord Loki's face.

[bouchonne]

Really? I'll grant your personality is bad, but it's not that bad.

[bouchonne]

I am, I am. Does "intolerable" have one "u," or two?