A warning

[justice_is_blond]

FORM: Sending crystal
SENDER: Anders, Oghren
RECIPIENT: Everyone
WHAT: People are being warned
WHEN: Current!
WHERE: Skyhold
NOTES: Oghren. Blue is Oghren, bold is Anders.

[There's a heavy sigh before he speaks; the first speaker, Anders, might be having some serious regrets.]

We've a new Warden, or rather an old Warden returned to the group, and I've a warning to issue: if you're challenged to a drinking contest with a particularly smelly dwarf, do not take it. The Wardens are not responsible for what happens if you decide to ignore this advice. Honestly, your best bet is to steer clear altoge--what are you drinking now?

[There's some bottles clinking together followed by a loud belch before Oghren speaks up.]

You need some better alcohol. This tastes worst than actual piss. Funny color to it too.

That's not... Maker's breath, Oghren, that's not for gulping down! Put the remnants of the potions down and stop messing with them! If you puke or you die, you better do it outside this tent. I'm not responsible for that either.

[There's more clinking as Anders gathers up what remnants he can.]

What are you going on about? That wasn't ale? [There's a pause.] My ancestors fat tits, what was that, sparkle fingers?

Who would keep ale in the healing tents? That was twenty doses of emetic. Now step outside, because you are not going to get sick in here.

[There's now a grumble and some rustling.] Never heard of keeping something good around for pain. Got to have those potions instead. Can't just have a good ale or something stronger. Got to be... [The sound trails off as he heads outside.]

[There's another heavy sigh. Anders sounds like he's already exhausted when he continues.]

Don't challenge him. Just don't. And if anyone listening cares to bring additional ghoul's beard to the healing tents, I'm in need of it.

Comments

[justice_is_blond]

Forgiven.

[And back to being amused, now that someone's not expecting him to take responsibility for Oghren. That's all on Jonas. Though now he really wants to see Kain's take on Alistair's 'maturity' when Nate and Anders are cuddling a little outside.]

Locks are useful, as is bribery. He likes alcohol. And food, but alcohol most of all.

[in_death_sacrifice]

So we just have to keep him well-fed and drunk, and perhaps he'll stay out of trouble? Or out of dragging the Wardens into trouble?

[Hm, well... it could be worth a try as a tactic, right?]

[justice_is_blond]

No.

[He snickers.]

There isn't a chance of that. He's Oghren. We can try, certainly. But he's going to get up to things no matter what. It's who he is.

[in_death_sacrifice]

[Sigh.] Well, the Wardens' reputation can't get much worse. And maybe the Inquisition will send him off on enough mission to keep him busy... and away. Far away.

He's at least dependable in a fight?

[justice_is_blond]

...You realize he can hear you, right? That no one would want to hear someone talking about them like that? I joke about him, yes, I warn about drinking with him, but that's because I know him. I've fought alongside him. I've earned the right to tease him as he's earned the right to tease me.

He's more than dependable in a fight, and I strongly suggest you get to know him before you continuously talk down about him.

[wardeneructate]

[This is the only time he's getting you fish for your cat, Anders.

You'll find it with a note that is sloppy and probably misspelled telling you it's for your cat.

...But he's totally not thanking you. Nope.]

[in_death_sacrifice]

Fine. [Pause. He may be overreacting a little, he did learn to get used to that damn parrot after all, so why not a similarly mannered dwarf?] And I wasn't intending to talk down about him, apologies if it seemed I did, but I wanted to be certain he's someone to be trusted to set aside the antics and focus on the fight at hand. That's all.

[justice_is_blond]

You called him a disgrace. That's not a seeming. Not to argue with you, but you did use harsh words rather than simply inquiring about his abilities.

In a fight, he is a stalwart ally and an intimidating adversary. You've nothing to worry about there.

[in_death_sacrifice]

No, I never said that. I only said to see that he doesn't disgrace the order, not that he himself is a disgrace. There is a distinction there.

I'm glad to hear that.

[justice_is_blond]

[He's... not going to go into semantics, implications or whatnot. It's not worth it.]

Next time perhaps wait to see a senior warden on the field before questioning them.

[in_death_sacrifice]

[But... but but drinking gross things and being disgusting and farting and... uuuuugh. Besides, things can be exaggerated in the stories people tell... he's only one to believe when he sees something.]

At least there's that. I'd still rather have someone I can at least trust in a fight even if... well. Even if I disagree on everything else outside of battle. I'll deal with that. [While keeping his distance otherwise.]

Your patience sounded like it was being tried in the initial message, yourself.

[justice_is_blond]

I've had to tend to the losing side of his competitions before. I'll tend to anyone who is ill or injured, but I will never claim to enjoy getting my boots thrown up on. I know that people won't listen, however, but at least I can take comfort in not being the sole healer around this time.

...Also, he was drinking things I'd worked to make. He was doing something directly to me. That justifies sounding a little harried.

[in_death_sacrifice]

You healers really do have it tough, dealing with all sorts of scenarios. [Though he admittedly doesn't always help, with his own behavior when it comes to being hurt... whoops.] Considering that, I'm glad you have plenty of help.

Well... all right. I understand that, though I still take it as a warning of sorts. Now I know what to expect. Maybe it won't be so bad...

[pinprick]

He is a hero of the Fifth Blight and the Awakening and you have the honor of being his brother-in-arms.

[wardeneructate]

[...Okay Anders is getting fish for his cat and you are getting a bottle of booze.]

[in_death_sacrifice]

[Siiiiiiigh. First impressions, though!]

Point taken. Perhaps I'll get a better idea of that side of him in the action of battle, that's where someone's true self becomes apparent.