crystal.

[byblow]

FORM: Crystal
SENDER: Alistair
RECIPIENT: Everybody
WHAT: More important questions.
WHEN: Todayish
WHERE: A crystal near YOU!
NOTES: Nah.

Politics aside - is that possible? Can we do that? I have faith in you, all of you -

[ Getting off topic there Alistair. ]

Politics aside, [ Alistair's voice continues, with scolding emphasis aimed at himself, ] who wears skirts better, do you think? Mages or Templars?

[ xoxo ]

Comments

[byblow]

Insecurity is a sad, sad thing.

[ He's got 99 insecurities but a skirt ain't one. ]

If Templars are fitter, what's pushing mages over the edge?

[samahl]

The promise of sensory play with just a well placed spell...

[byblow]

Sensory what now?

[samahl]

Sensory play.

Have you never had a mage warm or shock up their fingers and touch your skin before? It's lovely.

[byblow]

Nnnnno. Can't say that I have.

[ He's never slept with a mage. Except Morrigan. And she's not allowed to shock any bit of him to any degree tyvm. ]

What has that got to do with their skirts?

[private]

[arlathvhen]

Cyril just likes making everything and anything sexual. I'm sure if your post were about strawberry tarts, he'd start taking about licking strawberry jam off someone.

You should just ignore him.

[private]

[byblow]

[ A little dryly: ]

But I'm learning so much.

[private]

[arlathvhen]

...If you ask him to stop, he will. Or I can ask, if you want to preserve that whole...masculinity thing.

[ She's still not really sure she understands it, but she's trying!!! ]

[private]

[byblow]

[ He laughs. ]

If I were that worried about my masculinity, asking you to handle my problems for me wouldn't help.

[samahl]

It's the promise of their magic. The skirt shows they might have magic. The magic holds the promise.

[byblow]

Wouldn't a staff or a sign that says "Hello, I'm A Mage" do just as well?

[samahl]

I suppose so! Although templars have all of that sword imagery. Both are rather phallic.

[byblow]

[ There's a moment of silence while Alistair tries to follow the logic there, then decides the logic must just be "find a way to say the word phallic." And JOKE'S ON YOU, BUDDY, he's 32 years old and he isn't going to sputter.]

Do just as well to show they're mages, I meant. It doesn't have anything to do with how well they wear the skirts.

If you just want to talk about which set is more attractive, sure. Though none of them smile enough for me. On average.

[samahl]

[Hey, Cyril's not the one with a flaming sword emblazoned on his chest.]

I know. We'll have to think of ways to get both groups to smile more. We'll have to work on our comedy.

[byblow]

Good plan. Maybe you could start by wandering through the Templar tents and telling them all how phallic their weapons are

[samahl]

Pretty much all weapons are, though.

[byblow]

Anything longer than it's wide is phallic, if you want to look at it that way. And if it's wider than it's long, you just tilt your head to the side, and voilà.

[samahl]

[He has to chuckle for a moment over that]

There you go, now you're getting it!

[byblow]

Great.

Now how do I give it back?

[samahl]

Oh, don't worry. I'll take it off your hands.