Important Survey Part 2

[windyvoice]

FORM: Crystal
SENDER: Jenny Lou
RECIPIENT: all u saints and sinners
NOTES: Deeply Serious Theological Discussions

Theological question!

Did the Maker and Andraste fuck? Also like what would happen if the Maker did fuck somebody and got them pregnant?

Also also for my Rifter bros so we can be inclusive and shit on the gods without getting smited, do your deities fuck and how's that work out for everybody.

Comments

[mereandrastianism]

[ Really. But the poor thing has clearly been given a terrible education in these matters. ]

Theirs was a spiritual marriage, Serah. Consummation was irrelevant.

[windyvoice]

Sure, but did they though?

[mereandrastianism]

Of course not.

[unshut]

[As if shocked this is even a question:]

Oh come now. Do we really think Mafereth betrayed Andratste simply on the basis of a desire for land?

[windyvoice]

No idea who that is.

[skulltasm]

OF COURSE THEY DID.

[windyvoice]

Okay, but how do you know?

crystal.

[hornswoggle]

Felt things had gotten too quiet around here, did you?

crystal.

[windyvoice]

No idea what you mean, I'm just a clueless Rifter asking questions about the local dominant theology. And Byerly started it anyhow.

[tender]

Depends on how strict you are about what counts as fucking, I guess.

[windyvoice]

At least one person's genitals were involved and orgasams were had!

[justashotaway]

The Maker is not real.

[windyvoice]

I mean that would kinda solve the whole did they fuck thing. I didn't know you were a skeptic!

[positioning]

Lowlanders do not think their gods do anything interesting at all.

[windyvoice]

Oh shit, do you have different ones?

[galvanising]

Yeah, I think Andraste made pretty clear what kind of relationship she and the Maker had.

O Creator, see me kneel,
for I walk only where you would bid me.
Stand only in places you have blessed.
Sing only the words you place in my throat.

Touch me with fire that I be cleansed.
Tell me I have sung to your approval.

[ it sounds like it's recited from memory rather than read. don't ask. ]

I mean, come on.

[windyvoice]

That was totally the part Byerly quoted, I still think y'all are just crazy horny.

[wythersake]

Is this going to turn into an absent father riff?

[windyvoice]

Boring, everybody knows gods are shit dads.

[hacker]

If you wanna get technical, I think God got somebody pregnant without the fun part.

But Thor and Zeus and all the rest, I'm pretty sure all they did was fuck. [ she read percy jackson, and it deeply influenced her opinions about thor, the Actual Person. h/t jane foster, congrats gurl. ]

[windyvoice]

See, that's why you got Saints, yeah? Cus if you pray to an old god directly, you wake up the next day and BAM! Pregnant!

Also what up, y'all got Zeus too, huh? Is he a piece of shit in your world?

[assistente]

I think it is a little-- [what would a good word be] --broad, to qualify this as a question of theology.

[windyvoice]

It’s about gods so it’s theology.

[rowancrowned]

Are you considering conversion?

[windyvoice]

[Oh hey scariest boss. is she going to modulate her answer to this..... nah. ]

Fuck no.

I mean, if the choice is converting and getting hung, I'll do it. I know some monotheists get super horny about that shit.