A SURVEY

[aventuriere]

FORM: Crystal
SENDER: Baroness Frédérique Durfort-Lacapalette, Brother Jehan Mercier, and Valentine Nicasius Maxence Mérovée Olivier de Foncé
RECIPIENT: Everyone
WHAT: Important questions
WHEN: Now
WHERE: Everywhere
NOTES: Please threadjack

Inquisition, we have a question for you.

[ DO NOT SILENCE YOUR CRYSTALS. That is an Orlesian voice, but it is not Val de Foncé's voice. Instead, it is the voice of a woman, which makes it immediately superior. You are probably safe. Maybe. Keep listening. ]

You see, we are scholars. The best of scholars! And this Inquisition, it offers the most magnifique opportunities to learn more of this world and we, my friends, we are here to take on that most noble challenge!

We are conducting a study. [ From the tavern. ] Which of Thedas' nations is your favorite? Le plus fantastique? [ A pause, some murmuring reminder while the crystal is covered with a hand. ] You may not say Orlais, and you must explain why, pour l'étude.

[ HERE is Val’s voice. Please keep listening. ]



You may not say Orlais because we already know that it is Orlais. We have been to Orlais, many times. [ A voice cuts in, dry: ] We are even from Orlais, in case you had not guessed. [ From, you know. The really obvious accents. ] For this, we seek other answers. Answers that are more diverse. Perhaps it is better to say second best? Second favorite? With, naturally, Orlais being the favorite. We are, you see, all in disagreement.

It is threatening to tear us apart, when we have only just been brought back together.

Yes, because you are wrong. If you would cease to be so wrong, we would not be torn apart!

No, you are-- Ah, courage, my friends! We must not be torn apart. [ There is some shuffling and oofing. It is possible that arms are being thrown about shoulders and necks are being squeezed. ] Inquisition, we turn to you, on behalf of our reunion, and the great Baroness Haut-Brion.

If you answer our question we will permit you to call her Freddie.

You will permit nothing, but I may permit it, if your answers are particularly clever.

Also, for a bet-- [ Should Chantry Brothers make bets? Shh. Should Chantry Brothers pause while speaking to drink wine? Shhhhh. ] How many times per day is it reasonable to pray? Suppose that you are also reasonably faithful.

Suppose that you are a madman, a holy madman--

And that you desire nothing more than to be Andraste's second husband and like Maferath to be cuckolded by the Maker himself--

[ Should Chantry brothers dump wine over the heads of their friends? Shhhhhhhhh. ]

Comments

[sunshinethroughgrey]

Oh that's so tragic! Is your pup one of the few left? Have you considered starting with a breeder, to save the race as it is?

[Really, Bethany had a love of all creatures and she wouldn't want such a brave race of pups to fall off the maps.]

[aventuriere]

Indeed, one of the very few. I rescued him from near-death while traveling in the mountains. There are some that remain, most in packs high in the hills far from mankind, and some others in the villages nearby that survived the decimation. I met a man there whose family has bred and trained them for centuries and helped to keep the line alive. When Bart is old enough we shall return and visit with his kennels to assist.

[sunshinethroughgrey]

Oh thank the Maker, I would hate to think such fine and brave animals died out. Good on you, for preserving them, the way you are. You have a good heart, serah.

[aventuriere]

Why thank you, madame. As do you, I am sure. It is not often we find one so sensitive to the plight of animals they have never met. May I ask to whom I am speaking? These devices make introductions very unusual.

[sunshinethroughgrey]

I value all life. It is too precious to waste, no matter whose it is. Bless me, what horrible manners I have. I am Warden Bethany Hawke, at your service, serah. To whom am I speaking?

[aventuriere]

Frédérique Durfort-Lacapalette, Baroness Haut-Brion, but you may call me Freddie if you like. It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Warden Hawke. Tell me, are you the sister to the Champion I have heard others mention?

[sunshinethroughgrey]

A good day to you, Baronness ... Freddie. Maker, I am awful at titles.

Yes, the one and the same. That's my older sister, Marian.