A SURVEY

[aventuriere]

FORM: Crystal
SENDER: Baroness Frédérique Durfort-Lacapalette, Brother Jehan Mercier, and Valentine Nicasius Maxence Mérovée Olivier de Foncé
RECIPIENT: Everyone
WHAT: Important questions
WHEN: Now
WHERE: Everywhere
NOTES: Please threadjack

Inquisition, we have a question for you.

[ DO NOT SILENCE YOUR CRYSTALS. That is an Orlesian voice, but it is not Val de Foncé's voice. Instead, it is the voice of a woman, which makes it immediately superior. You are probably safe. Maybe. Keep listening. ]

You see, we are scholars. The best of scholars! And this Inquisition, it offers the most magnifique opportunities to learn more of this world and we, my friends, we are here to take on that most noble challenge!

We are conducting a study. [ From the tavern. ] Which of Thedas' nations is your favorite? Le plus fantastique? [ A pause, some murmuring reminder while the crystal is covered with a hand. ] You may not say Orlais, and you must explain why, pour l'étude.

[ HERE is Val’s voice. Please keep listening. ]



You may not say Orlais because we already know that it is Orlais. We have been to Orlais, many times. [ A voice cuts in, dry: ] We are even from Orlais, in case you had not guessed. [ From, you know. The really obvious accents. ] For this, we seek other answers. Answers that are more diverse. Perhaps it is better to say second best? Second favorite? With, naturally, Orlais being the favorite. We are, you see, all in disagreement.

It is threatening to tear us apart, when we have only just been brought back together.

Yes, because you are wrong. If you would cease to be so wrong, we would not be torn apart!

No, you are-- Ah, courage, my friends! We must not be torn apart. [ There is some shuffling and oofing. It is possible that arms are being thrown about shoulders and necks are being squeezed. ] Inquisition, we turn to you, on behalf of our reunion, and the great Baroness Haut-Brion.

If you answer our question we will permit you to call her Freddie.

You will permit nothing, but I may permit it, if your answers are particularly clever.

Also, for a bet-- [ Should Chantry Brothers make bets? Shh. Should Chantry Brothers pause while speaking to drink wine? Shhhhh. ] How many times per day is it reasonable to pray? Suppose that you are also reasonably faithful.

Suppose that you are a madman, a holy madman--

And that you desire nothing more than to be Andraste's second husband and like Maferath to be cuckolded by the Maker himself--

[ Should Chantry brothers dump wine over the heads of their friends? Shhhhhhhhh. ]

Comments

[degenere]

If it isn't in a book... This is a page you have written? And kept, folded, in your pocket? In the hopes that we would ask you what your favorite country is?

Créateur. You Free Marchers are a sad, strange people.

[judgemewhole]

No, no, just the reminder that we kicked you out of the Free Marches. I do have the exact dates written down, if you like.

[degenere]

Please.

[judgemewhole]

In 5:67 Exalted, the Hero of the Fourth Blight, Tylus who by the way was the first Van Markum King of Nevarra, won several decisive battles against Orlais, finally driving the Orlesian Empire out in 5:40. That was when Nevarra was, of course, growing out of the Free Marches and becoming it's own nation, but it was still considered part of the Marches then.

Later on, in 8:05 Blessed, Kirkwall drove the Orlesians out and regained control of their city, although they did keep the title Viscount. So they can thank you for that.

[degenere]

A wonderful title, if you're interested in such things.

Tell me. In your telling, was Nevarra so similarly expelled?

[judgemewhole]

Actually, Nevarra rose to it's own power and became a nation without any help from the other Free Cities. However that did mean when they came here to try and conquer us, we sent out the Hero of Tantervale who firmly trounced him back to Nevarra.

That was in 8:82 Blessed, in case you were wondering.

[degenere]

How illuminating!

So, would you say that Nevarra, in a way, expelled the Free Marches first?

[judgemewhole]

No, because we never tried to conquer them. They in fact, turned around and tried to conquer us.

[degenere]

Only after it had risen to its own power, without the help of the Free Cities. So it was a friendly expulsion, and rejection. And then a forcible embracing.

[judgemewhole]

Which was summarily rejected.

[degenere]

A pity. I think the Free Marches would be much more interesting, if Nevarra had once had influence.

[judgemewhole]

I would think Orlais would be more interesting if they stopped trying to define what is 'interesting'. Pity neither one of us will get what we want.

[degenere]

Ah, monsieur. In Orlais, we would say, Petit a petit, l’oiseau fait son nid. 'Little by little, the bird builds its nest'.

So, I wish Nevarra well.