crystal;

[satinet]

FORM: Crystal
SENDER: Cassius
RECIPIENT: All riftwatchers great and small
NOTES: You should definitely reply to this. Don't worry about why. Threadjacking welcome/encouraged.

Greetings Riftwatch! This is Senior Enchanter Black speaking—the Seneschal.

[This particular cheerful intonation may strike fear into the hearts of certain members of the company. Namely, those who would prefer not be talked at for ten minutes without interruption, or those who might flinch at the prospect that at any moment their wages might be trimmed further in order to set aside a reserve fund for Refugee Orphans Or Whatever.

But today, when Cassius says,] I'll be brief, [he means it.

Which is definitely not ominous in the slightest.]

I'm collecting information about which nations and known institutions we as an organization know best. If you would be so kind as to reply to this listing the peoples, places, and various consortiums big or small for which you feel the most affinity or understand the intricacies of, that would be of great help.

There's no need to go into any detail if you don't feel inclined. A very general list will do just fine.

Comments

[muckspout]

Are you asking for everything we know anything about?

everything?

[satinet]

No. I'm asking where you come from and who has your sympathies. 'I'm Fereldan and support anything that might empowers the Denerim Cheesemongers Guild.'

[bouchonne]

How dare you steal the answer out of my mouth.

[notathreat]

I’m from an apocalypse and I support not having one here. That would be super, thanks.

[armd]

Seconded.

[satinet]

Ladies, please. Taking the offer to make broad statements a little too seriously.

Have you really formed no specific opinion on anything here? I promise not to be critical.

[This is a safe space for your bad Rifter opinions. You're welcome.]

[cozen]

I am from Val Royeaux!

[ As if this could possibly be new information to anyone who pays attention to anything about anyone. ]

And in Val Royeaux, I know everyone in the printers guild, very many musicians, and most of the good pâtissiers.

[satinet]

Champion of Orlesian Tradesmen. Noted.

—Not some proponent for peasant uprisings, I hope. This is unrelated to the survey.

[Is it?]

[cozen]

[ Is it. ]

Certainement pas! A country must be kept like a home. There must be a place for everything, and everything in its place.

[ His tongue in his cheek is audible, but also plausibly deniable. ]

[exequy]

Why?

[satinet]

Why not?

[exequy]

Because it is nosy and obnoxious.

[altusimperius]

[well]

The Tevinter Imperium. And its aristocracy.

[satinet]

That you know them well, or you sympathize with their plight?

[“Plight.”]

[altusimperius]

The former.

[come on man]

[bouchonne]

I know all the hedonists and all the scoundrels and all the fallen women and all the actors in Ferelden, Orlais, and Antiva. And many in the Free Marches. And a few in Nevarra. Honestly, everywhere except the Anderfels, and that's just because the Anderfels doesn't have any of those.

[satinet]

[As if narrating aloud while taking a note somewhere—]

Byerly Rutyer...Nationality: Scoundrel... International Actor's Guild...and Seamstress Enthusiast...

[sparklequeen]

Kirkwall has like, maybe two taverns I'd consider acceptable. Tops.

[satinet]

Luckily I don't believe the Kirkwall Tavern Association [That's not a real thing. Probably.] is a recognized force in regional politics.

Come now, no need to be shy. We're all friends here. How goes your investment in our refugee crisis? What would you prefer we be doing if we're not doing it already?

[tender]

After everyone's had their say, will you be putting this into some sort of written list?

[satinet]

Lists are for people who can't remember things.

[hornswoggle]

Generally speaking, I have the ear of a fair amount of crews passing in and out of Kirkwall.

[ what sort of crews, who can say. ]

[satinet]

And would you say you share their interests, or just their profession?

[Is he calling Silver a merchant, or is he accusing Kirkwall merchant sailors or piracy? Who can say.]

[illithidnapped]

Seeing as how they're our most despised enemies: Tevinter, naturally. 'Know thy enemy' and whatnot.

Am I allowed to ask why you're sniffing around for our respective opinions?

[satinet]

I don't see why not.

I'm preparing for our upcoming season of visitors. Summer, you know—everyone who's anyone who isn't currently waving a sword around will want to make their arrangements for the coming campaigning months, and I would like to see that we entertain the right guests in the right fashion, and that we all agree on who those people are and what that fashion is.

Not that I don't trust my good taste, but—

[But he's a benevolent overlord. You're all welcome.]