[ Clearly, this message is being sent on slight impulse, a certain degree of stress and despair in his tone despite being delivered, initially, with somewhat sarcastic cheer. ]

It appears I have come into a sudden wealth of--

[ A brief pause, a struggle, not really wanting to say it. ]

--poultry. Livestock.

[ In the background, the gentle clucking of perfectly content chickens makes for a background to Dorian's clipped syllables, clenched teeth, the slight implication in his tone that he might laugh or cry or both, left unchecked. ]

Do come by if you would like one of these. Take as many as you can carry, you're welcome to them. They're not leaving, they just keep running back in, I swear they're following me around-- oh, look at this, just--! It laid an egg! In Nevarran satin! And feathers, everywhere, this coat was spotless, and now it looks like I've rolled around in a chicken--

[ This is the moment he realises why this is happening to him. ]

--coop. Well, I hope you're happy. [ Whether he's addressing a broody hen or Leliana is left to interpretation. ] But no, really, someone take them from-- no no no, get away from that--

[ Message ends. ]

This message is for anyone that has a shard in their hand, their chest, or otherwise on their person; Rifter or Thedosian or otherwise. If you are so fortunate or unfortunate depending upon your view of the shard as to have one I've questions for you in the interest of better understanding that which you have and what it means for your health, the world around you, and how likely it is you might attract demons in your sleep. At my current best estimate the odds are high in on last but I tend to err on assuming the worst and being pleasantly surprised when the world doesn't rain down fire, death, and the undead.

If you would rather speak in person and are in Emprise du Lion- I can be found in my healing tent. If not? I will return to Skyhold at the end of Guardian if you would prefer to wait to speak face to face or am available at all hours on the crystals.