The worst sort of would you rather for doglords, probably

[inagutterson]

FORM: Sending crystal
SENDER: Yngvi
RECIPIENT: Everyone
WHAT: An important question for doglords/people with dogs, everyone else can chime in
WHEN: Now
WHERE: Skyhold
NOTES: Just Yngvi in general? Probably language. Feel free to threadjack.

I have a question. [And so goes the dramatic pause. Or just the general pause as Yngvi remembers what the question even was in the first place.] S'pose it's for the dirty doglords among you but if you've got a dog you can answer, or if you feel like making a guess, I'm not some sad little scholar but I want to know the answer.

D'you reckon a Fereldan would make a dog pie if there was nothing else to eat? Or would they starve first and let the dog eat?

[Christine you're welcome.]

Comments

[universal_charm]

And this is an example of why we cannot have nice things.

_{[ He's sighing so very much, not the least because he's a tad upset with the tone of this question considering his relationship with a certain Fereldan. ]}

[inagutterson]

Correction: the doglords are why we can't have nice things. Kirkwall is the example.

[Excuse you.]

[universal_charm]

From what I understand, Kirkwall is an entirely different example of why we cannot have nice things.

People asking incendiary questions clearly meant to rile people up is another.

_{[ Spade's a spade, Yngvi. ]}

[inagutterson]

Oi oi oi, I'm from Kirkwall. Born and raised.

[In Darktown is where he spent most of his days.]

I'm asking on behalf of a friend and to help when it comes to providing supplies for when we're in tight spots because this is important shit to know.

[universal_charm]

Here's a wild idea - plan accordingly so that the idea of eating a dog isn't one you'd have to consider at all.

And even if it is, tact would be appreciated.

[inagutterson]

You can't plan for everything, that's just...wow. You can't. Can't be done. And I'm not the one that's wanting to know about eating a dog, it's like cultural observations and shit 'bout Fereldans. Bet the Orlesians did a whole course on this at their fancy university.

I like to kick tact in the face as I saunter past, tact is for rich folk that hire us to do what tact doesn't allow them to do themselves.

[universal_charm]

If you're having to ask if a Fereldan would mind eating their dog - which I think just about anyone would mind not just a Fereldan - then probably don't include it as part of your plans and think of something else.

Tact gets you answers instead of growls and possibly a punch to the face.

[inagutterson]

You ever made a soup out of grass, twigs, dirt and what you're really hoping is deep mushroom? And I'm assuming they were twigs, it was pretty dark and I don't see in the dark like an elf does but they looked white, and that soup tasted pretty marrow-y if I recall right…

[Ah, childhood in Darktown, there's nothing quite like it.]

You're describing every conversation I've ever had with my family, not even counting the extended bit. No one told you 'bout dwarves?

[universal_charm]

Yeah - I don't think they were twigs then.

_{[ He's going to not touch that right there. He just.. won't. ]}

I've heard stories, but I hear a lot of things from a lot of people.

[inagutterson]

They were good, stomach didn't eat itself.

[So that's all that really matters to him.]

Have you heard it from a dwarf though?

[universal_charm]

You would be the first, I have to admit.

[inagutterson]

[Let him just. Sigh.

Explosively.]

Well whatever you've learned from anyone else is a load of pish, let me tell you that now. And I know because I'm a dwarf and I've lived it.

[universal_charm]

I haven't actually heard or read much about dwarves. Though some tavern songs I've heard sung are quite interesting to say the least.

Care to set the record straight?

[inagutterson]

Bet they all came out of an Orlesian or Fereldan. But if you're about the tavern, come find me, the name's Yngvi or 'that one with the nugs' like I don't buy them food and drink too, the cheek.

S'thirsty work explaining the shit people get wrong. Humans get wrong, don't think elves and horned folk give two shits really, and like, who writes all the books? Humans.

[universal_charm]

I can remember Yngvi just fine, don't worry, though I apologize if it takes me a few times to get the pronunciation correct.

I take everything I read in the libraries with a grain of salt for that reason. I prefer to talk to someone from that particular culture or race if I can, so I would be honored if you would speak with me on dwarves.

[inagutterson]

Oh you'll crumble when you get to my surname if you think you'll get stuck on that.

[Asher Hardie's other legacy, besides the animal pelt slankets.]

Tell you what, you can pick the date, just need to make sure it won't clash with my dinner plans with the Orlesian scholar and the rifter because that'd just get too confusing, trying to have that many chats all at once.

[universal_charm]

Just give me a few tries, I can do it.

How about you tell me when those are and I'll pick around those? I'm in the tavern most nights, frankly. Not much else in the way of a nightlife here.