OPEN.

[degenere]

FORM: sending crystal
SENDER: Val de Foncé
RECIPIENT: everyone, you cannot escape
WHAT: joke time
WHEN: a slightly respectful length of time after the death announcemet. emphasis on slightly.
NOTES: full offense, but you guys smell

Inquisition.

[Very serious, very Orlesian.]

There were three Fereldans walking the streets of Kirkwall and they came upon a large brown pile. As the streets of Kirkwall are so very narrow, the brown pile was quite blocking their way, so that they had but two choices to them: they could either tramp through the pile, or they could turn back.

The first Fereldan approached the pile, leaned down, and looked very hard at it. "By the Lady!" he said. "This looks like shit."

The second Ferelden approached the pile beside him, leaned down, and took a great big sniff. "Maker!" he cried. "This smells of shit!"

The third Ferelden approached the pile beside his companions, leaned down, put his finger into the pile, and the put his finger in his mouth. "By Andraste's sword!" he exclaimed. "This tastes of shit!"

The three Fereldens turned to go back the way that they had come, saying to one another, "It's a good thing we didn't walk in that!"

[GET IT.]

There! Now our mood is lightened. I welcome anyone that would try to outmatch me in jokes.

Comments

[el_tybs]

[He was jokingly calling puns a hidden talent - singular mind you - but it's far too amusing to hear Val is intrigued to say anything against that.

Meanwhile, there is a rather loud noise happening in the back of Sam's crystal followed by the mage himself giving a loud sigh.]

Did you really? [Referring to goading on the man.] I'm trying to get work here done.

[degenere]

Did I really what? Ask for clarification? My apologies if it is a distraction to you, the question of where we would find suitable space for a fight. I am only trying to understand, you see.

[el_tybs]

That first part was not clarification. You're purposely egging him on because you aren't right here in front of him. So, yes, it is distracting-

[There's a pause as the shouting gradually getting softer with the accompaniment of footsteps.]

I think he just left to go find you.

[degenere]

Is he a hound?

[el_tybs]

He's definitely just a regular human.

He might just ask around until he finds you.

[degenere]

What a strange and ineffective tactic. I hope your friend does not hunt very often. He would tread down the whole of the forest.

[el_tybs]

Acquaintance. Honestly, that was just an educated guess on what he's doing.

Is it really? I'd say having your name, where your accent is from, and that you're Inquisition narrows it down quite a bit.

[degenere]

In Orlais, we have a saying for this. It comes out to, "in the ocean, the sapphire is invisible". Easily lost, you see? What seems as if it should be obvious is not always obvious.

For example: I am not wearing a mask. How very not Orlesian. And it is not as if the Inquisition brands us, yes?

[el_tybs]

Well in this case, if you were wearing a mask you'd be easier spotted since you aren't in Orlais, yes?

And... no, but that's enough to go on that if he asks someone else in HQ they could point him in your direction. All I'm saying. Just be careful.

[degenere]

Well, yes, my bare face would be spotted. But I would not be known as an Orlesian, because they would expect an Orlesian to be wearing the mask, you see?

It is very simple.

[el_tybs]

Ah, ok. [He's not sure how true that is, but then again he knows better that Orlesian doesn't equal mask.]

And what about your accent?

[degenere]

Of course, I can put on a false one.

[Like, duh.]

[el_tybs]

Really? You can do a fake accent?

[degenere]

I can do many! I have traveled all across Thedas, you know. And I have heard many different voices, and met many different people.

[el_tybs]

Alright then. What's your favorite one to fake?

[degenere]

Oh, Nevarran, most definitely. There is a charming brutality to it. As if the words must be stabbed.

[el_tybs]

Really?

Val is that an underlying thing that you may like to stab things?

[degenere]

I prefer the crossbow. But I have not survived this long because I do not like to stab things. It has often been a necessity.