Sending Crystal

[lifeofendurance]

FORM: Sending Crystal
SENDER: Aleron Darton
RECIPIENT: The Inquisition
WHAT: Al's Mama has sent an unwanted gift. He wants to give it away.
WHEN: Nowish, but wiggleroom for responses
WHERE: Kirkwall
NOTES: Nuglets. Mama is trying to teach him how to diplomacy. Ahahahahaha. Fail.

[That squeaking sound? That's the sound of a crate of nuglets. Eight nug babies to be precise. Over the top of it can be heard Aleron grousing under his breath: Maker and I thought the dresses were bad.]

It appears I have come into the possession of a crate of nugs, which I am to 'distribute as I see fit'?

[Quiet muttered grumbling as he tries reading the note again and sweet Andraste has Mama gone mad?]

Honestly, Mother, how am I to know what... 'prized pets with darling outfits'? Why?

There is attire of some sort for the nugs if that is of any interest. They'll be in the Gallows for anyone who wants them.

Comments

[inagutterson]

Always running around doing something, making traps and mechanisms, tinkering. S'nice having nugs. They don't all look exactly alike, people can tell dogs apart so you spend enough time around nugs you figure it out, Stroganugg's a big bold one, Jambonette flops over to sleep first chance there is and they stick together.

[He is a good dad and also has nug twenty-one on a timeshare with Thranduil now so there's that.]

[justice_is_blond]

Cats are much the same way. They've their own personalities, their own ways they like to be pet, their own ways to flop over on the ground... and their own way of making trouble.

[This is reawakening his desire for a second cat. There's no chance he can have twenty, but maybe he can get a second. It also does mean that he's going to make a change on the crystals, because while he knows people get hungry enough to eat cats, hearing about it isn't pleasant.]

I'll not speak of... what I was publicly on the crystals again. I'd no idea their popularity as pets had spread beyond those who stayed in Skyhold.

[inagutterson]

Also take up less space than a dog. Smell less than a dog. Less eating on them than a dog.

[Look he grew up in Darktown, he remembers all those doglords flooding in. And he did ask on the sending crystal.

Certain things make sense and cats are a hundred times harder to catch. (Have a dog and a cat run off with your dinner, see what one you'll grab hold off first, it's not going to be the cat that's for damn sure.)]

They've always had them as pets in Orzammar going back...well someone can come correct the surface dwarf if they fancy, don't really care to remember much about a place that smells like Darkspawn. Orlesians like them but that's not saying much, you can get Orlesians to like anything. Spymaster had some I think?

[justice_is_blond]

Imply something it exclusive, or that Fereldans can't get their hands on it, and Orlesians will swoop down. Probably in a flock, likely giggling. Definitely while smelling of perfume.

[inagutterson]

So who has the sense of dignity then? S'that why everyone's still scrapping all the time? Nevarrans like the perfume more, or at least all the time. It's the corpse thing. Spend all that time with them having tea with dead auntie Brunhilde and you need it.

[justice_is_blond]

No one has dignity. People pretend at it, make claims at it, but it's an elusive matter. And I've... spent time around a corpse before. Taking tea with him was fairly unpleasant.

[inagutterson]

The fuck were you doing with a corpse? You don't sound Nevarran, they're the only ones with business drinking with corpses unless you're a mercenary and someone wants proof of death.

[Rich people are really really weird.]

[justice_is_blond]

[And here's the point where a silly anecdote becomes a headache.]

It wasn't by choice. A spirit ended up in a corpse and they decided I should babysit it and reattach what bits fell off that it needed if it was going to keep swinging a sword.

[inagutterson]

I can't write this back in a letter to the company. [You know that particular complaining not of the early twenty-something? You're hearing that.] It'll be all 'Yngvi did you trip over some of the gaatlok barrels that're still lurking somewhere' or 'I know we don't say much about the elfroot but we're saying something about the elfroot'. Gunnar's an alchemist and he'll still say all that.

[justice_is_blond]

Or you write back to them anyway and be smug in knowing that you know more than them in this.

[He's used to this sort of complaining. He's done this sort of complaining, so it's easy to joke along with.]

By the time they actually start saying something about the elfroot they've been thinking it for a time, you know. Gunnar may have some recommendations.