therookery | bring out your dead

FORM: Sending Crystal
SENDER: Baroness Frédérique Durfort-Lacapalette, Brother Jehan Mercier, and Valentine Nicasius Maxence Mérovée Olivier de Foncé
RECIPIENT: Everyone
WHAT: CHASSEURS DE FANTÔMES
WHEN: Early Cloudreach
WHERE: From Kirkwall, listenable anywhere
NOTES: Your favorite people!

—will come try to stop us, [ Jehan is whispering when everyone's crystals come to life, but it's capped off with a sigh as he realizes it is too late, too late, alas. ]

They must know [Val, in a stage whisper. He hardly cares about being heard.] Inquisition. We have been in Kirkwall for how long now? Long enough that some of us have seen shades. Spirits. Ghosts.

Inquisition, these are but exaggerations. Do you know how we know this to be true? [He’ll tell you. In a second. The dramatic moment is slightly spoiled by a sudden sharp intake of breath, and a loud SPLASH.] Sacre-- the oar!

Careful! [ Freddie is there too, naturally. ] Keep it in the lock-- there. Inquisition [ she begins again in Val's place ] we have heard your tales of supposed hauntings, but we three have spent countless hours toiling in these Gallows and have not seen a thing! Not one spectral wisp! And so, you see, we cannot help but doubt. We are women--and men--of the sciences, after all. It is merely our nature.

Men and woman of the sciences, [ Jeannot corrects, because who doesn't like being corrected ] and of faith, merci, and we do not mean that anyone is lying. Of course the Veil is thin here. But surely not so thin as the stories.

And so, we have returned at night--which I am sure we can all agree is the most appropriate time for ghosts--to give the spirits the chance to prove all of you correct by revealing themselves to us.

Do not be afraid for us! This is not even the tenth most foolish we have ever been, particularly Freddie and Val, and so far as I can tell they yet survive—we would welcome advice, however. Where have you witnessed these spirits reaching through the Veil? Were you doing anything to attract their attention?

And how do we attract their attention? Tell us, so we can try for ourselves! Must we cause a great scene, and commotion? Must we SHOUT? We are willing to shout-- O, SPIRITS! HEAR US, AND APPEAR! WE WOULD WITNESS YOUR--

[ muffled muffled something like a hand has been clapped over his mouth. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Do you know how often one finds a locked chest upon such an adventure? It is too dangerous to split or destroy, for what if the contents were destroyed with the vessel? And it is too maddening to leave behind unopened.

Not really. So far all the places I've been such chests have been long rusted and easy to get into, or there are no chests at all.

That still doesn't quite answer what kind of adventure you're going on. Thieving?

Thieving. Only the uneducated would call it such a thing. We recover, monsieur, recover and preserve.

I'm sure it's called that depending on the context of whom you're getting your stuff from.

I'm sure it does not. Thieving implies that we take for some profit of our own. The only profit we truly seek is the profit of knowledge. Anything else, it is like when you have a cheese with a rind on it. You want what is within, but the rind, it is good to eat as well.

I'm pretty sure thieving isn't about profit but about stealing period. Course if no one is there to call you out on it...

So you think thieves steal only for fun?

Some do.

I'm not saying the person who is thieving isn't looking to make some sort of profit, I'm just pointing out that thieving itself just means that there is stealing involved. So even if you're only in the pursuit of knowledge, depending on where you're taking the item from someone might consider it thieving.

Then you believe knowledge is a thing that can be stolen? Ah, monsieur. My mind has been compared to a bear trap, in its quickness and its cleverness. Perhaps you are onto something there!

Well... I'm sure that's what spies do regularly, steal knowledge and give it to someone else.

I invite any spy to try to steal the information contained within my mind.

I believe they use something called 'torture'. [... Or mind reading, but he's not about to bring that up.] I wouldn't welcome anyone to try and do that.

[He's not a spy so he doesn't know but that's what he pictures anyway.]

That would not be spying then. Does spying not denote a light touch? A secrecy? Torture is very direct and loud and mess and involved.

Secrecy yes, but don't a lot of spies infiltrate who they're spying? That sounds very involved to me. And I don't believe killing is off their list since I've heard people have been killed to keep quiet.

This, too, I would invite someone to try! I am Orlesian. We are not killed so easily as that. Furthermore, if I were killed, I would manifest forthwith as the most annoying ghost Thedas has ever seen. I would cause such destruction and chaos and mischief to these torturing bastards that they would beg for their lives to be brought to swift and violent ends. They would commit themselves to prison and judgement of whatever authority or god they could find.

Why would he need to be a ghost to do that? Don't people ask for that now?

_{[ There's the sound of shuffling sheets in the background and grumbling. ]}

Keeping people up with his nonsense...

You really should just stop inviting people to try and torture and/or kill you.

[Mostly because he's not sure he'd be able to handle a ghost of Valentine haunting places.

At Kirk's interjection Sam sighs at how grumpy he is, but seems apologetic as well.]

Didn't mean to wake you.

Should I? But no one has succeeded. Or attempted in any successful way. Not even those whose slumber I might have disturbed.

[Is he apologetic? No!]

Probably because he's not actually worth spending a lifetime in prison for.

_{[ A mumbled 'that's okay' and more bed sheets shifting, a heavy,
sleepy sigh. ]}

You only spend a lifetime if you get caught. That being said you have to be worth killing for anyone to attempt it, and the person not being the murdering type.

[As grumpy as Kirk is he knows being woken up wouldn't send him to killing someone.]

Well. I did say successful. I have been on many adventures, some more daring than you or your ill slumbering companion might expect.

There was also a 'no one attempted' part to that though. If you fail at even attempting then it usually doesn't happen.

[Least that's how he's understanding it.]

I think you mean 'ill awoken'. I'm pretty sure it means 'put the crystal away and go to sleep'.

Clever mage.

_{[ The smack of lips on skin and the creak of a bed as Kirk moved and
half flopped on Sam. ]}

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_{[ Snort. ]}

I think he means in his head - probably his dreams.

My adventures, do you mean? Am I the he and the his that you speak of? Because: no.