004.

[propulsion]

FORM: Crystal
SENDER: Tony Stark
RECIPIENT: All
NOTES: n/a

Allo and bonjour. It is also I, ze Maker. Hon hon hon. Don't tell zat othzer guy.

[ —comes an extremely gravelly, maybe drunker verson of this post, but immediately switches to a more recognisable Tony-sounding voice. ]

Just kidding. It's your new dad, Tony Stark.

Uhhh so some of you will be aware that Thranduil Baudin stepped down from his position in the last month or so, going into I assume elf retirement. We thank you for your service, sir. Did you guys know he used to be a brunette before taking up this job? Wild.

Anyway. I've accepted the position of Division Head for Research, even if I cannot possibly live up to his hair game. I know, uh, most of you, maybe some I don't, in which case, do better and make yourselves known.

On that note—

[ Exaggerated sound of paper rustling. ]

We have a lot of irons in the fire, potentially. Gates to discover and—close? Protect? Should probably make a call on that. Rift-spots to canvas. Airships to launch, weapons of mass destruction to definitely not build, frogs to capture. If you're in the Research division and bored at any time, close your eyes and throw a dart, or look busy.

Door's always open, unless it's not. I'll put a sock on the handle if so. Bye now.

Comments

private to division heads

[bouchonne]

[ A little cluck of his tongue. ]

And here I was, saying just the other day that the person we brought on as head of research should be not an asshole. Ah, well.

[ In spite of the words, and in spite of Byerly's whole deal, that comment's actually not meant to offend. ]

Welcome, dear fellow.

[propulsion]

Must be something about the job, the people it attracts.

[ —likewise easy and unoffended. ]

Thanks. Did you know rue's a summer flower? Otherwise I'd have made good on that bit.

[muckspout]

There can only be one.

[propulsion]

Avec moi poisson, come at me.

[elegiaque]

It's true, his hair was as dark as mine. Don't say anything to him about it, though, he's very sensitive.

[propulsion]

[ Another exaggerated paper rustle, and then in the tone of someone carefully writing it down; ]

Invent... and stock... Just For Men... lustrous... chestnut... okay, got it.

private.

[ipseite]

Congratulations on your appointment, Provost Stark.

It has been brought to my attention that there has been some more thorough record-keeping on rifter comings and goings that may be of value to your work. I understand you to have more of a focus on the rifts and their nature than some previous projects.

( all the elf stuff. not that thranduil didn't care about rifters, but first of all she didn't approve of almost anything he did and would never have given him this without having her arm twisted first. )

∞

[propulsion]

Yeah? Hi, thanks. Yeah?

[ This is very distracting information. ]

How far back are we talking?

[murderbaby]

Please inform me if you need anything archived or organized, Provost.

[propulsion]

All.

[youwonscience]

Hey, boss. Still settling in, so if you want me to prioritize something while I'm populating the to-do list, let me know.

I thought the frog thing was hazing, glad to know that's real.

[propulsion]

Frog sure is a thing, yeah. I saw Isaac filled you in a little on Bierstagg. It's on the list.

[heorte]

[ rare crystal appearance to say, very warmly— ]

Congratulations.

[propulsion]

Thanks. It'll be fun.

[ See those other div heads? Don't they look like they're having fun? ]

[nonvenomous]

[propulsion]

[okayimin]

Oh good.

Naomi explained thermodynamics to me. I think we can do something with that, if we could get stronger ties to Orzammar's crafters. Also I'd like to establish a few colonies of Deep Road specific mushrooms here. There's a cell in the dungeon that's the perfect environment.

[propulsion]

Like.

All of thermodynamics? The concept of thermodynamics?

[runesmith]

Are we or aren't we building weapons of mass destruction. I can't tell.

[propulsion]

Depends who's asking.

[oyedeng]

I suppose that means I should dig out my manners and thank you for helping scrape me out from under that rift, bosmang.

[ There's wry humour in that voice, but she adds, a little more outwardly earnest: ]

I barely remember it, but Amos told me. Thank you.

[propulsion]

No problem. I mean, arriving in Thedas is a rough day by most metrics, but you had it extra bad.

How's gravity?

[degenere]

Monsieur. There is a frog?

[propulsion]

Une petite grenouille.

[ —actually Orlesian, not Earth-French. ]

With trois eyes.

[kantikoy]

Gates to close, I vote, if a vote is to be taken?

Congratulations, Ser Stark. I'm afraid I don't need a father figure at this time, however.

[propulsion]

Thanks. And don't worry about it, that's a Research only bonus. I can't say you won't be missing out.

And yeah, they're not doing anyone any favours staying open.