crystal.

[cozen]

FORM: Crystal
SENDER: Bastien
RECIPIENT: Everyone
NOTES: Nah

I need some Orlesian names. Besides the one I have, I mean.

[ He could choose himself. This is more fun. ]

I will put them in a hat and choose one, so—a little ridiculous is fine. But if it is so ridiculous I cannot carry it off and I and perhaps some other people are killed, it will be a little bit your fault. You will have to live with that.

[ He’s not serious. Just for the record. Anything so ridiculous he can’t sell it will be discarded. ]

Comments

[cozen]

[ He laughs. But— ]

Perhaps next time, when there are fewer other potential murderers to worry about.

[bouchonne]

Mere cowardice, that.

[cozen]

[cozen]

Fine. But a minor lord, not a Duke. There are too few of them. Someone would know.

[bouchonne]

[ With a grin - ]

You could be a visiting Bann.

[cozen]

If I had a reason for a Bann to cross the front right now, and more than a few days to practice the accent. When I come back I can make you teach me. Or try. It will probably be terrible.

[bouchonne]

Give it a go now. I adore your Fereldan accent.

[cozen]

You are a menace today.

[ But he says it in his Orlesian-pretending-to-be-a-Fereldan-hick accent, which is lifted directly from a performance of Wilkshire Downs. ]

Did someone put a spice in your dinner?

[bouchonne]

[ And Byerly joins in, his usual upper-crust cosmopolitan drawl turning more towards the broad accents of his rural compatriots. ]

They better not have, now, or I'll be cross indeed, you know I can't take a spice.

[cozen]

[ Sounding cartoonishly faint: ] I wish I knew it not quite so well.

[bouchonne]

One time someone tried to put a carrot in my stew. I punched them in the jaw, because you know I don't want anything more flavorful than a turnip.

[cozen]

Turnips and potatoes. The Maker’s perfect foods.

[bouchonne]

As the mabari is the Maker's perfect creature.

[cozen]

They could only be better if they were made of turnips. Someone should tell Him.

[bouchonne]

I shall send the truth to Him in my prayers tonight.

[cozen]

After you pray for the wealthy.

[bouchonne]

Dear Maker, protect the wealthy, so that they remain fat for me.