I. OPEN.

[liberalum]

FORM: Sending crystal.
SENDER: Dorian Pavus and some fans.
RECIPIENT: Everyone.
WHAT: Karma.
WHEN: Guardian 18.
WHERE: Skyhold
NOTES: I won't actually action this one out, but we can work out by arrangement if your character would in fact like a chicken, but most will go to the barn despite this offer. Dorian just wants people to remove them. ;-;

[ Clearly, this message is being sent on slight impulse, a certain degree of stress and despair in his tone despite being delivered, initially, with somewhat sarcastic cheer. ]

It appears I have come into a sudden wealth of--

[ A brief pause, a struggle, not really wanting to say it. ]

--poultry. Livestock.

[ In the background, the gentle clucking of perfectly content chickens makes for a background to Dorian's clipped syllables, clenched teeth, the slight implication in his tone that he might laugh or cry or both, left unchecked. ]

Do come by if you would like one of these. Take as many as you can carry, you're welcome to them. They're not leaving, they just keep running back in, I swear they're following me around-- oh, look at this, just--! It laid an egg! In Nevarran satin! And feathers, everywhere, this coat was spotless, and now it looks like I've rolled around in a chicken--

[ This is the moment he realises why this is happening to him. ]

--coop. Well, I hope you're happy. [ Whether he's addressing a broody hen or Leliana is left to interpretation. ] But no, really, someone take them from-- no no no, get away from that--

[ Message ends. ]

Comments

[gatheringstorm]

And Leliana thought you needed chickens because...?

[liberalum]

Because we're such good friends.

[ Droll for life. ]

I'd been admiring the awful racket of her monstrous birds above my library and made a comment to that effect, and now, here we are.

[gatheringstorm]

Tsk, Dorian. Never annoy the spymaster; I'm pretty sure that was in the orientation somewhere. You're lucky if it just ends here.

[liberalum]

Oh, undoubtedly. I've no intention of exacting any sort of revenge.

[ He sounds so convincing! And slightly too specific. ]

[gatheringstorm]

Oh, really? None at all? And what happens the next time her ravens are too loud for you to read?