003.

[champions]

FORM: crystal
SENDER: Kostos, Nikos, Marisol
RECIPIENT: everyone
WHAT: don’t feed the zombie
WHEN: current
WHERE: Kirkwallerino
NOTES: Zombies, man. Related to the Nevarra diplomacy effort.

Beloved Inquisition. Charming, benevolent, remarkably good looking, delightful Inquisition.

(Here there is a quiet snort of sarcasm that belongs to Nikos.

Off to a great start. Marisol sighs wistfully. ) You will be happy to know that we are making headway in repairing our relationship with Nevarra. There is much to do, still, but the team I attended with did excellent work, and I am thankful to all of them.

Marisol. ( Quiet chiding, not really meant for anyone else but her. The point, Marisol, the point. )

Ah! ( A moment of enlightenment. Bless you, dear cousin. ) Another of my wondrous Nevarran relatives has descended upon the Inquisition. She is residing in the Gallows, but I would ask all of you to treat her with the utmost respect, and maintain a safe and healthy distance.

( c: )

She— ( wait, no, Kostos isn’t playing along with that ridiculousness ) —It is in a locked room in the central tower. You should not be at risk of encountering it unless you make an effort.

Don’t make the effort. Unless you want your eyeballs speared by long fingernails and the state of your cloak slyly disrespected. The former more likely than the latter. I think her tongue is rotted. (wait…. In a Kostos voice that actually sounds pretty much like his own voice, slightly different accent, slightly more sullen? Less sullen? Hard to say.) It has a rotted tongue. All dust.

(And he sounds way too darkly amused about that. Meanwhile, Marisol sounds as chill and entertained as always, the faint note of reproof entirely playful. )

Great Great Great Aunt Berenike is a woman of considerable reputation, but presently also of considerable temper. She has very graciously acquiesced to participate in our efforts to cure the revered dead of the Necropolis of their current ill-humour, but she is not not one to suffer fools.

Except for dinner. She will gladly suffer fools for dinner.

Comments

[doneisdone]

A necessary acqu--

Maker.

[where to begin.]

And I suppose nobody's considered putting them all down? We've got to make sure all our wealthy corpses are happy law-abiding citizens? Have you made sure she's got a little umbrella in all her cocktails?

[champions]

( Unseen, she smiles. It isn't a nice smile, or a mirthful one. Marisol becomes immediately more businesslike. )

You are aware, I assume, of our damaged relationship with Nevarra? Aware of what the Inquisition is trying to achieve, and how much more difficult that becomes with each potential ally they alienate, or enemy they steel against them? The perceived attack on Nevarra that was the battle in the Necropolis has turned many powerful individuals and not to mention the Mortalitasi and the court against the Inquisition. If the problem was simply a collection of monsters in danger of attacking people, yes, that would be an option, but this is not. These are their most revered dead, being considered precious, many of whom the Inquisition already destroyed.

Furthermore, if we can determine what was done to them and how, it might help us narrow down who was capable of doing such, and why. Make no mistake, this is a matter of diplomacy and the Inquisition's interests, and of protecting those of all classes, not only the wealthy who you hold in such disdain.

[doneisdone]

Oh I'm well fucking aware of it, girl, well aware.
Tell yourself whatever you like, as long as the hand feeding that pretty mouth keeps you in its favor.

[champions]

And yet you are selfish enough to dismiss the need of protecting all of Thedas and uniting power in favour of serving out insults. I have fought, and I have had to secure things for myself without relying on favour.

[doneisdone]

[A bitter laugh, followed by venom:] I'm sure you have.

[champions]

You presume a great deal. ( Marisol, on the other hand, has slipped back into what sounds like genuine amusement. ) Are you sure you are not a preserved corpse, yourself? You have the manner for it.

[doneisdone]

[A pause, thoughtful in its way-- the burn was good, which even Teren appreciates, but something else about it stuck her.]

Perhaps.

[champions]

You know, Berenike Averesch purchased many slaves from Tevinter through her life, but they would go missing. She would buy countless slaves upon slaves, without the vast majority of them ever being in her household for any extended period. Fearsome rumours circled her; a murderess, human sacrifices, perhaps blood magic, although she was not a mage.

After her death, records were found. She was buying people as slaves, and then setting them free, arranging them discrete passage to their homelands, or places where they might be able to get work that did not see them in shackles.

I think the least we can do for a woman of that caliber is see her body restored to what she hoped it would be, after death. A peaceful vessel, not this.

[doneisdone]

Spare me the sympathetic fairy tales, lass-- I've no doubt she did good things in her life, as did Owen down the docks who made toys out of old fish hooks for the local children. He'd little coin and was found days after he died in his home, no dignity or afterlife to be found, and was burned in the Andrastian way on account of the shores being too mucky for proper burial.

If a woman had the fortune of coin to spend on doing good for the world, I'll not shame her memory, but nor will I accept that she deserves this or that beyond a dignified death. Certainly not for her violent shell to be offered more consideration than those who suffer in Nevarra, or on the base level, the unfortunate Inquisition servant who happens to open the wrong door.

[champions]

I stand by my prior points. The matter of her character is... not so relevant as all the other reasons why this is necessary, but I find it helpful to remember who she was.

And as I have mentioned to others already, she cannot be simply happened upon. She is contained within a secured cage, behind multiple reinforced doors and a portcullis. The purpose of her presence is to aid the Inquisition, not allow for absurd antics.

[doneisdone]

For your sake, I hope you're right.

[exsecutus]

Here's a thought. Let's go and dig Owen up, and all of his friends with him. I'll mummify them myself if it means we stop sharing insufferable personal stories.

If you want my story, I hate the charade of a funeral rite. It's outmoded and an asinine waste and another institution that wields power through fear and contrivances of limitation. I suppose that means I agree with you. [which, ew] This asinine waste happens to be my favorite thrice great aunt, who is here to be studied so Nevarra and the Inquisition can safely open doors all over Thedas. The wealthy and the dockworker alike.

So what, in this case, would make you happy?

[doneisdone]

[The narrowing of her eyes is almost audible.]

For you to stay out of a disagreement that's as resolved as it's going to be, for one.

[exsecutus]

[don't COME for his STUPID COUSIN ok]

Please. Marsiol is foolishly accommodating, as befits her rank. If she can do something conveniently charitable, she will. Just say the word.

[doneisdone]

[SCOFF]

Don't patronize me. My words have been said. I didn't need her permission, or yours.

[exsecutus]

And I will remember them always.

Now, crawl back to your tower room so we can lock that portcullis behind you too.

[doneisdone]

[Well that struck a nerve.] Oh fuck off.

[champions]

( HE CAME TO HER DEFENCE

SHE DOESN'T NEED TO SAY IT 8]

BECAUSE KNOWING IT IS ENOUGH 8] )

[exsecutus]

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