therookery | (no subject)

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FORM: Crystal
SENDER: Kain
RECIPIENT: Everyone!!
WHAT: A dreaded wedding invitation has arrived!
WHEN: Now-ish
WHERE: Skyhold
NOTES: Warnings doubtful

Tell me... if you had to come up with a really good excuse to avoid attending a wedding, what would you say?

[Oh, yes, sure, of course this is a purely theoretical question. Yep.]

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'To whom it may concern, we regret to inform you that Warden Kain has fallen in battle against the forces of the Elder One. Thus he will not be able to participate in any wedding celebrations.

Deepest condolences,
The Inquisition'

Edited 2016-12-18 23:47 (UTC)

Not bad. Not bad at all. I like the sound of it, and it does excuse me from attending any more parties, once and for all. I'll start at once... [Wait a minute, time for some logic here.] No, wait, I'm supposed to be dead. You or someone else will have to write it, then.

Offer a small monetary reward and I bet you'd have plenty of people jumping to do it. Just don't offer to anyone at the tavern who's been there a while. Drunks have terrible handwriting.

Good idea. I can hardly write my own death announcement, after all.

Your plans are always the best ones, Korrin.

You're welcome.

Weddings can be fun, though, at least the receptions afterward. If there's enough good booze, you can survive them just fine.

So you're saying... if I did go, being very drunk would be the key to getting through it?

[Look, he's desperate, so any option helps.]

It can't hurt. Just try to be drunk enough where it doesn't bother you, but not so much that you'll hurt the Wardens' or Inquisition's reputation. Much as I hate to say it, we still need some of those assholes to fill our coffers.

Edited 2016-12-23 16:08 (UTC)

I can manage that. I'm not one to make an uncomfortable scene, anyway, if I can avoid it.

[More likely, he'll turn inward and get all moody and miserable.]

I appreciate the warning, all the same.

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