tonight on cops: thedas edition

[inagutterson]

FORM: Sending crystal
SENDER: Yngvi Congealedinagutterson. Yes that's his name
RECIPIENT: Unfortunately everyone.
WHAT: Yngvi goes to check in on Gwen's dad. He tries to contact her using Asher's sending crystal before he heads to Skyhold. He ends up contacting all of Skyhold. (But Gwen's dad is trying to murder him so that can probably be forgiven.)
WHEN: Probably slightly backdated to a few days back. Timey-wimey
WHERE: Orlais; the Vauquelin estate
NOTES: Language. Dwarfing under the influence. Violence in the background.  Threadjacking totally allowed!

[Here's the thing: just because Yngvi took possession of Asher Hardie's sending crystal upon Asher's death (some one had to, since someone has to stay in Skyhold to honour the fact that Asher signed them up and Yngvi is the charming one okay, most suited to that legacy) that doesn't mean Yngvi knows how to use said sending crystal.

So what's meant to be a private message to one Gwenaëlle Vauquelin becomes horribly public.]

Gwenaëlle? Is this thing-- [Okay that is a lot of angry background noise? Does it sound Orlesian? It probably sounds Orlesian.

To some who know him it might sound alarmingly like Emeric Vauquelin actually. And the frantic scramblings of a dwarf.] So here's the thing, I stopped by to see your old man, avail myself of his legendary hospitality. He's in rude health. Just wondering if you wanted anything picked up? I've got the silverware and the best brandy. By the way, what's that really dark purple colour because it's my colour I look--

[There's a very loud crash, and a truly ear-piercing shriek from the dwarf on the other end of the sending crystal.] Sir! Sir I am changing!

[[ooc: Hello welcome to Yngvi's liveblog escape from the Vauquelin estate where Gwen's dad is going to eventually try to shoot him with a crossbow. He has this completely under control.]]]

Comments

[gatheringstorm]

Maker, that handle. Just pick one of her names and be done with it. Not that she's even worth thinking about.

[Korrin would happily punch that vile woman's face out the back of her head. No one messes with Mal like that, not on her watch.

And...retching sounds. Awesome.]

Leaving him a present? I'm sure at this point he'll never forget you anyway.

[inagutterson]

No, shut up she gets all three. You take it up with Mal when he gets back from being a sad old man somewhere. Bet Asher's off up in the sky pissing himself laughing. Or he's just some bird giving him shit. Literally.

[Badum-tssh.]

So...you know how there was an elven woman that was tidying Asher up, since my Lady and Asher were close [tempting fate here, saying that name three times in a row] and she didn't want him going to his Lady a state? Might've wanted the same for the Comte. Might've done something to his drink. With the beard.

[gatheringstorm]

Gross, Yngvi.

[Though she snickers a little even as she says it.]

...you know, there are days when I have to wonder how you're even still alive. This is one of them, in case you didn't realize.

Make it back here in one piece and I'll get you the strongest, grossest excuse for alcohol that you'd want.

[inagutterson]

Carta is Carta.

[Like that is the answer to everything. Because it is.]

I need to conduct some business first, one of my other old friends is here too! I need to be hobnobbing, can't be seen slumming it with you lot, it's not Kirkwall, I've moved up in the world.

[gatheringstorm]

Someday, that phrase is going to lose all meaning.

You do that, Yngvi. I'd never keep such a distinguished gentleman as yourself from your duties.