Sending crystal, Open to all

[gatheringstorm]

FORM: Sending crystal.
SENDER: Korrin
RECIPIENT: Anyone in Skyhold
WHAT: Warning people of the dangers of gravity/using her as a cushion.
WHEN: Any time after arriving.
WHERE: Skyhold
NOTES: Not yet? Who knows.

So, I can't help but notice I'm a magnet for falling elves these days. Is this some extreme sport no one's told me about? I'm all for supporting breaks in tedium, but I'm not sure some of you have thought this through. In case you haven't noticed, I have these things called horns. I'd hate to gore anyone by accident, but the way things are going I'm not optimistic. Just food for thought in case you're tempted to seek out a qunari cushion.

[Yes, her tone is more amused than annoyed, but she might actually be worried about hurting the more fragile folk.]

Comments

[salvatore_underfoot]

How many elves have fallen on you for this to be a problem worth addressing?

[He is so very curious. Do they fly now?]

[gatheringstorm]

One in the rookery, one nearly jumped onto me earlier elsewhere, and I swear it almost happened by some scaffolding, too, if they hadn't regained their balance at the last possible moment.

[salvatore_underfoot]

Huh. Here I thought elves were graceful. Was I misled?

[gatheringstorm]

Perhaps? That or Skyhold is cursed for them.

Either way, I might have to resort to horn cozies.

[salvatore_underfoot]

That'll just encourage them!

[gatheringstorm]

So I should wait until one of them is gored by me instead? I don't think the Inquisition would look highly on that.

[salvatore_underfoot]

They may learn to stop falling on you. What do they call that? Tough love? I think the Inquisition will forgive you.

[gatheringstorm]

I'm not sure they would if I had elves dangling from my horns.

[salvatore_underfoot]

[He laughs.] By Andraste! Why would you leave them there?

[gatheringstorm]

Who said I'd leave them? But someone could still see it.

...that's not an image I ever need. Why do I do this to myself?

[salvatore_underfoot]

[Still laughing.] You could paint them gold and say they're decoration.

[gatheringstorm]

Andraste's tits, that's even worse than the idea of putting up nude, gold qunari statues like someone mentioned going to the main hall. Somehow you manage to combine morbid and tacky, well done.

Lost this in my email!

[salvatore_underfoot]

What are you talking about? That's an amazing idea! Who is this genius? That you think I'm better is quite a compliment. My thanks! Morbid and tacky. I'll have that engraved on my tomb.

[gatheringstorm]

[Snicker.]

Well, as long as you're pleased with it, I suppose that's what counts.

[salvatore_underfoot]

Quite pleased. [If one could bow through a sending crystal, he would.] Good luck with your horns and your falling elves.