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FORM: Sending crystal.
SENDER: Twisted Fate.
RECIPIENT: Everyone!
WHAT: The party returns, and Fate has a request.
WHEN: Backdated to Cloudreach 29.
WHERE: Skyhold.
NOTES: N/A

Ah, Skyhold. Terribly good to be back home. I'm certain you all missed me, didn't you?

In any case.

Clan Frandruil has notified me that they wish to send halla our way. Terribly considerate of Keeper Shoshanna to show such gratitude. I don't particularly care what the Inquisition wishes to do with them, so I defer to those part of Clan Ashara. They are yours, as far as I am concerned.

In any case, something of more immediate concern and interest to me: I've received a mark from the rift we dealt with. As terribly excited as I am to be blessed with this, I'd like to do a little more research on this. [And maybe remove it, but he has a feeling that's impossible.] Those of you already familiar with your own magical glowing green marks, please, enlighten me with whatever you know.

And before I forget: Sera, I've placed your things back in the room in the tavern. If you happen to find anything of mine left in there, it's yours to do with.

I think that ought to do it. I'll be in the tavern, drinking myself silly.

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[He blinks, showing surprise that he'd not wanted to, but he's never been good at keeping a straight face. Everything shows.]

If you'd like.

[The words are slower now, as if he's bracing for some sort of... trap? He's been judged and found wanting. People don't generally care to have more to do with him after. Except for one reason, and he gestures to a hallway that leads to a small room with a few tables, generally unoccupied.]

Are the halla injured or ill? I've not treated any before, if you're seeking that, and there should be enough Dalish who know them who could do a better job than I.

[The expression that flits across Anders' face gives Fate a pause as he considers. Had Anders assumed the worst? Perhaps that is something he can relate to.]

Oh please. I'm not terribly concerned about the halla. The other Dalish can fuss over them.

I figured we could talk. I owe you an apology for growing impatient with you. You and Justice are still bit of a pair of asses, [Spoken a bit jovially.] but I could have handled things better.

[It's delivered so easily, as if it costs him nothing to apologize, as if he means it. Maybe it's a mistake, but Anders is getting tired of being vigilant and doubting everything constantly.]

You'd feelings involved.

[He takes a breath. Fate's making a huge mistake, trusting a Templar who still believes herself to be above mages, better, but it's not like any heart has ever listened to reason ever before. Nerva has no right to cast a shadow over anything related to Anders again, and so he'll not make further comment there.

Fate gets the smallest of smiles, still with a little nervousness but present, and a nod.]

I accept your apology. Thank you. I'd not expected that.

[He can be an ass, and often needs to be, which means that part gets no argument either. A beat, and with a warmer voice:]

Your trip went... well, then?

Edited 2016-05-01 19:44 (UTC)

Several, really. I don't much care to get involved in such debates, yet I did it anyway.

[The smile helps, even if he can see the nervousness. Twisted Fate won't insist anything further.]

I'm an unpredictable man, Anders. And capable of recognizing my own mistakes, I like to think. I'm not one to end a friendship over a disagreement. I'm a little harder to be rid of than that.

[Ah yes. The trip. The Dread Trip, as it were.]

Better than I thought, but still horrid. I hope I never have to go back; I think I can still smell the judgment from Clan Frandruil all the way from here.

I've known many people who were not hard to see the backs of. Most seem to find it easier to be done after one disagreement, and an association with me is not a... preferred status to have.

[He exhales.]

It's easier to let them go than fight it, I've learned. I'm... I'm glad that you've not chosen to end the friendship, though.

[But there are easier topics. Or at least there are for him.]

And what does Clan Frandruil have to do with anything? Do they look down on your lack of love for halla?

If I ended friendships over one disagreement, I'd be a very lonely man indeed. [He chuckles.] If it's any comfort, I'm not concerned much about the opinions of other people in terms of the company I choose to have.

[Most would certainly not approve of a friendship with Anders, and already several do not approve of Nerva. Either way, it's a difficult matter, but he's trying to make a habit of keeping friends instead of losing them.]

I've lost enough friends to know when one is worth keeping. You needn't worry.

[Ah, this. He snorts softly.] Most clans look down upon me, really. Clan Frandruil was the one that I was originally born into but as a boy we ended up... parting ways, shall we say.

I don't really hold much Dalish traditions to heart. Halla included.

I'd be... well.

[Lonelier than he tends to be. He hemorrhages people whatever he does, because between him and Justice there is an overabundance of passion and anger.]

I'm glad when there are those who think I'm worth keeping. Especially when the feeling's mutual.

[Which is why, for once, he's holding his tongue and not being an idiot about someone else's choice. Nate's made a foolish choice of a partner as well.]

Can I ask why you've got vallaslin if you left as a boy? Or is that a topic you'd not like to delve into?

Let's hope those feelings stay that way, hm?

[Twisted Fate knows that he could very easily lose everything he's built here. It's a gamble, it always will be, but if someone says that they are truly his friend, truly dedicated, then he will try to hold onto it.

For as long as he can.]

My vallaslin was given to me before I had left. Suppose I should clarify; a vallaslin, as you probably know, is granted when we step into adulthood. My Keeper felt I was ready. I don't necessarily agree that I was. And when I made an independent choice, I was punished for it.

Parting ways is a delicate way of saying that I was banished, specifically.

[He nods his head, agreeing with the hope as they continue to walk and Fate talks onward.]

I'm... Mm. You seem to hold little love for them, but I'm still sorry nonetheless. Losing one's family is no easy thing. And you'd think they'd expect someone they've declared an adult to show individuality.

Are the halla a sign that they've lifted the banishment, or they were trying to buy your retreat?

One would think, but the Dalish have a framed expectation. To dream of what they think was the past, and expect to continue on in our lives forever marching in the woods. Doesn't sound particularly wonderful to me.

I think it's my grandmother's way of trying to make it up to me. She wanted me to return, though that sort of thing is impossible. I wouldn't return to a clan for any reason in my life.

Not to judge, but it doesn't sound wonderful to me either. I'd appreciate the traveling, but little else of Dalish life.

[He offers a little smile.]

They don't seem to have cats. How is that any way to live, or anything to return to?

Well, you and I have that in agreement. I enjoy seeing the world, but less confined by someone else. [He cracks a smile and shakes his head.] Ah, if I could go back to it.

Too true. Pets are not exactly the norm for the Dalish, though I suppose the closest to come to it would be the halla.

And just what would you do if you ever suddenly became allergic to felines? That would ruin you.

If I must choose between daily suffering and my heart being forever broken, I'll take the suffering and still be a friend to cats. It is a worthy sacrifice.

[The smile is growing, slowly, bit by bit.]

I'd be absolutely beside myself if I could never hold a purring kitten again. And I'm a little sad my free traveling is at an end, but being on the run alone is, well, lonely.

[And he's always disliked being alone.]

That's almost adorable.

[How much Anders adores cats. He'd accumulate a hoard if he could, Fate bets.]

Mm. That it is. I can relate to that.

Careful, there. You've come dangerously close to thinking of a mass-murdering abomination as adorable.

[His voice is a little wry, but light enough. He is what he is. Fate knows it.]

You're trusted by a Templar. Maybe one day we can request you as my guard and we can go for a ride. Horseback, of course. You and I both have people who would object to other sorts of riding now.

[That earns a soft laugh.] Well, I've done hell of a lot worse, if it's any consolation.

So long as you're steering. I'm awful at horseback. Used to walk everywhere, personally.

[That earns a pause, and he glances at Anders.] Oh? Both of us now? Might I ask who it is?

In a way, it is.

[There are so many people here who have done far worse, and so few who recognize it. The ones who do have his respect. The ones who think he's the worst person here do not.

The horseback comment gets a flash of a grin before he sobers up and takes a breath.]

I trust you, which is why I'll name them on a condition: you not spread it. I'm certain it will be common knowledge all too soon, but... [He swallows and forges on.] The Templars took the last person I was in a relationship with. Because of the relationship. They cannot now, but the chance of people seeing hurting him as a way to hurt me...

[He is afraid. As much as he wishes he could lift fear from his life and the life of all mages, he is still afraid.]

[It's still a startling thing, how much people trust him, how many of them do. He thinks briefly to Malsaam, and smiles faintly to himself before he shakes his head.

Well. That's far away for now.]

You have my word, Anders. Whoever they are, they will remain a secret with me. I'm terribly good at keeping those.

[He knows too well what it's like to lose people you're close to for one reason or another.]

[The people who make an effort to be his friend are few and far in between, and there's no gains for them in it when it comes with the requirement of being near him. It is enough for Anders for this.]

Nate. Nathaniel Howe. I knew him when we served alongside Jonas Cousland, before... Before everything went downhill and changed. Apparently he'd had feelings for me all along but thought my flirting was simply mockery, rather than actual interest.

I remember hearing about him. [And seeing him, from time to time.]

Funny how that works, doesn't it. [Fate's tone is flat, a brief frown flitting over his features before it returns to his usual easygoing expression.] Well, I think a congratulations are in order. I hope, in due time, you can be with someone openly without concern for their well-being.

Congratulations for me. Consolations for him. He could use better taste but it's too late for him now.

[It's delivered lightly, but he does believe it. Nate's sleeping with an abomination. He could do far better.]

I doubt it will ever be safe to be in a relationship with me. It will come out, and there will be anger that I'm with someone as there's anger that I'm alive. But Nate's a Grey Warden. He can hold his own.

His taste is his taste, and he has what he wants. I congratulate anyone that finds something so precious and can hold onto it.

[He himself tries not to wonder how long his time with Nerva will last. For now, he holds on, as tight as he can.]

I suppose that is so. Regardless, I wish you two well with it. Truly, Anders.

And I treasure his holding, and don't want him to let go.

[Despite how he's warned Nate. The other is... a little harder.]

I wish you happiness.

[And he hopes that her Templar nature never causes harm to Fate.]

I believe you deserve it.

Then I think you two are in good hands. With each other, obviously.

[That... gives him pause. Words he did not expect to hear. How often people are saying things to him -- I trust you, you deserve to be happy, and I love you. Sometimes it almost troubles him, and he waits for the other boot to drop and everything to be torn down.

He almost doesn't know how to respond.

Instead, he smiles, looking arrogant as he usually does.] I do, don't I? I work hard, cheating at cards and pranking Inquisition agents. It's about time I got a little slice of joy myself.

[He smirks to the first, and it grows as Fate talks on.]

You've been banished, and you're not fickle. Those seem to make it worth it. But don't think I won't remember you cheat at cards. I can't even win when everyone plays fairly; I won't play against you.

[A beat, and for a moment he looks speculative before shaking his head.]

I almost asked if you'd teach me, but I can't bluff or hide what I'm thinking a great majority of the time.

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