crystal.

[cozen]

FORM: Crystal
SENDER: Bastien
RECIPIENT: Everyone
NOTES: Nonsense. If your characters will not say anything but are obviously/observably involved with people, please feel even more encouraged than normal to "not here" reply with the deets for everyone's gossip-gathering purposes.

Bonjour, mes amis.

[ Faintly sing-song, but in a drawling and subdued way. It doesn't do to sound too chipper and excited about asking people semi-invasive questions. ]

I have been talking to the Seneschal, and we thought—well, it's possible we might need a fraternization policy. Or a record, at least, in case it becomes a problem later. And to decide whether that is necessary: information about fraternization.

[ It's obvious from his voice that he's pleased that that rhymes. ]

So who is together? Or involved, if together is a scary word.

Please feel very free to rat out your bashful friends.

[ As an afterthought, ]

If you have opinions about the policy or record part, I will take those, too.

Comments

[cozen]

I’d take a wild guess. Mine is…

[ A pause to run down the mental roster. ]

Monsieur Dickerson. He seems subtle enough to be getting away with it. So far.

[apocalypsegrown]

A man with the name Richard Dickerson is subtle?

[cozen]

I’m sure he didn’t choose it.

[ Who would ever. ]

[icasm]

I'm rather sure he did.

[cozen]

Are you? Why?

[icasm]

No mother names their child that.

[cozen]

I think you are underestimating what mothers are capable of.

[icasm]

But it's just a repeating dick joke.

[cozen]

Yeah.

[ His tone makes that yeah mean obviously.

He stands by his point. ]

[icasm]

Perhaps I think too highly of mothers.

[ He sounds doubtful, though. ]

[apocalypsegrown]

Unless he's actually the master of subtilty by being wildly unsubtle as a diversion.

[cozen]

Hmm. That's possible. But I'm not sure it's more likely than his parents not knowing what they were doing. Or perhaps he had a grandfather Richard his mother was determined to name him after, and then she married a Dickerson and said, oh no, what have I done—but followed through on the name. For her father.

[apocalypsegrown]

Yeah I'm sorry but I'm pretty familiar with choosing pseudonyms and that one is just too perfect not to be one.

I bet his real name is something like Nigel Cornswallop or something. And he had to spice it up.

[cozen]

Nigel Cornswallop sounds much more fake.

[apocalypsegrown]

More fake than what amounts to Penis Penis’child.

[cozen]

Tell you what. You and I, we go to the city guard and say we want to join. I will tell them my name is Richard Dickerson, and you say your name is Nigel Cornswallop, and we will see which of us they don't believe.

[nonvenomous]

private

[bouchonne]

He told me that he'd screwed our mad bomber.

∞

[cozen]

Gideon?

[ A moment of consideration. ]

He was not bad-looking, I guess, under the scowling.

[bouchonne]

But the personality.

[cozen]

[ Sighed with dismay: ] The personality.

Did it sound to you like an ongoing arrangement? Maybe they did not have to talk.

[bouchonne]

Nnnnnooooooo.

[ Byerly says that consideringly. ]

But honestly, could you imagine someone that humorless being any good in the sack?

[cozen]

[ A considering hum. ]

No. Not for me. Maybe Richard likes that sort of thing. Maybe they had a terse disagreement about something and exploded with sexual tension.

[bouchonne]

Richard also seems a bit like he's a sexual zero.

[cozen]

Oh, he is not. I know.

[ His very knowing tone probably gave that away. ]

Not from direct personal experience, but I went to Tevinter with him. We needed access to a woman's room, and he handled that— [ a pause to search for a word ] —deftly.