let's talk anything but politics

[staysail]

FORM: sending crystal
SENDER: Darras Rivain
RECIPIENT: everyone
WHAT: Girl of Your Dreams, the most important game ever played
WHEN: now
WHERE: the Gallows


So for those of us that don't feel particularly moved to be adding our voices to any debates over the Divine. [Well, wait.] No, that's unfair of me. Anyone is welcome to be playing this game. It's just that you might be too busy.

Though it's quite easy. Doesn't take much attention. It's Girl of Your Dreams, and it's meant to be played when you're exceedingly bored. Every bit of this dream girl is perfect, except there's one detail, one tiny detail, that's terribly wrong. Like... "Girl of your dreams, girl of your dreams, except she's got goat's eyes." The ones with those terrible square centers, and they're half wall-eyed? And then everyone has got to say if they'd still have her or not. Which--in honesty--for that one, I would.

We could play it about the Divine, if that would strike you as more topical. "Future Divine of your dreams, Future Divine of your dreams, except she'll only eat food that you've chewed for her." Still vote for her, or not?

Comments

[elegiaque]

They're forever up and down sheer cliff-faces, maybe they just actually don't care. How do we know goats rely on those eyes for anything except alarming other animals?

[aventuriere]

Perhaps. Or perhaps their eyes have a hard surface and we don't know, having never had the misfortune to touch them. They could be like stone.

[elegiaque]

( a horrified, fascinated silence. then, )

Would it have to have a soft part somewhere to see?

[aventuriere]

One would assume? Surely if it did not some animal would really have stones for eyes.

[elegiaque]

The stone would have to be clear, then, to see through, so—

It can't be, or Orzammar would have plucked out all the goat eyes to extinction by now.

[aventuriere]

Are there goats in Orzammar? I don't recall ever hearing of any. But then, why not? They like rocky places and eat anything. They might thrive in the Deep Roads.

[elegiaque]

And Orzammar trades. If there aren't goats there, wouldn't gem goat eyes be even more highly sought after?

[aventuriere]

I cannot argue the logic, thankfully. Can you imagine jewelry made of goat eye gems?

[staysail]

They're not.

[aventuriere]

You say it with such certainty. Have you touched a goat's eye, monsieur?

[staysail]

'Course I have. You haven't?

[aventuriere]

Of course not. Whyever would I go about sticking my fingers into goat's eyes? It seems rather rude on top of disgusting.

[staysail]

Oh, they like it very much, actually.

[aventuriere]

I confess I've no idea whether you are telling the truth or not. Goats do look mad, so it seems possible.

[staysail]

I've got no reason to be lying to you. It's true. Goats are mad for having their eyes touched. It's about the only thing they are mad for.

[aventuriere]

Now I'm certain you're lying. Goats are quite mad all the time, just look at their eyes! Even without a finger stuck in them those are not the eyes of a mentally stable creature.

I take it you would not abandon the girl of your dreams if she had goat eyes, sir?

[staysail]

'Course I wouldn't. Especially as I know the trick of putting a finger in her eye. That's the sort of thing that would take you years to learn, and I know it from the start. What an advantage.

[aventuriere]

Does the girl of your dreams already include goat eyes, then? That you might make use of this hard-won talent? Or perhaps you are the man of all goat-eyed-girls' dreams?

[staysail]

It'd be the latter, I think. If I ever had the chance to meet a goat-eyed girl. D'you know any?