therookery | (no subject)

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FORM: written message delivered by couriers
SENDER: Sina
RECIPIENT: All members of the Rifts & the Veil research contingent.
WHAT: An invitation
WHEN: Late Kingsway
WHERE: an unoccupied room in the Gallows' mage tower
NOTES:

Fellow researchers of rifts & the Veil,

I have arranged for Atticus Vedici to investigate my shard, under the escort of Templars and with as many of you present as you like. As both colleague and friend to most of you, your presence would mean a great deal to me, and perhaps, if any are willing, we could first investigate someone's hand.

I would not ask you to volunteer for this. I recognize that in this situation I am somewhat uniquely imperiled. But your aid and witness would be welcome.

If you'd like to come, let me know and I'll give you the day and time. Please understand that I do not want this to be common knowledge, both for my privacy and to reduce the possibility of someone trying to stop us.

Siuona, First of Clan Dahlasanor

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

Siuona,

You have my attention, and will to assist in whatever manner I may. Name the time and location, and I shall attend.

Warden Inessa Serra, project leader

I'll be there.

--Myr

I would be interested in observing.

Is there anything one might need to bring?

-薬売り

Siuona,

If this is who I suspect it is, then I think you are making a mistake.

I will attend, but Atticus Vedici is not the sort of criminal that inspires awesome trust. Be more cautious.

Sarkan
The Dragon

Edited 2017-09-18 12:14 (UTC)

It was a very slow progression, but Nari had noticed. The coughs were just a tiny bit longer, a tiny bit harsher. The wince that sometimes pinched her clansister's face when she drew breath after a fit of them a tiny bit deeper. Slow, small, but... it was killing her. It was going to kill her.

The woodworker was loathe to lose any of the time they had left to some freak magical accident--and she hadn't been oblique about that reticence--but ultimately, "It's your choice," she said. "It's not as if we know for sure it won't flare and open a rift again. And we know that has no chance of making a positive change."

She squeezed the younger woman's shoulder and hoped her face was more reassuring than worried. "I'll be there."

Sina took the squeeze as an indication that she should lean into Nari, expelling a weary sigh as she lets her head grow heavy and rest on her friend's shoulder. "It's the only choice I have," she whispered, closing her eyes for a moment's grave pause.
"I..." She began, then trailed off. No need to finish the sentence. Others had already guessed at what she had been trying to hide: that she was dying, and more rapidly now.

Anything that will help you to record what we find, or enlighten us on it.

Sarkan,

I don't trust him. I have few options.

Siuona

Rather than respond with any words--and which would be good enough, anyway?--Nari leans her head to rest atop her clansister's, cherishing the solidity of the contact; she's still here. If only for now. Another squeeze for the shoulder; I'm still here.

"Is there anything I can do or promise that would make it easier going in?" she asked, "Sometimes I can't sleep for worry that I've left some tool out to wander off come morning." The tone was light, but the meaning clear enough. If you leave us behind, what can't remain undone?

[Do you know how often Church has had to write letters? Not often.]

I'll be there but I don't like it and actually you're being a fucking moron and I hope you don't actually do this. If someone else is dumb enough to try it on their hand, that's at least better right? If he opens a rift out of you I'm blaming you fully just fyi.

If something goes wrong are they going to take off his head? Because that seems like a good immediate effective solution. Don't do this. Bad idea.

Church

Church,

Have we any hand volunteers? It is common sense to ask for one, and I did, but I will not force it.

Whether or not the experiment on my own shard succeeds is irrelevant to me now. Perhaps we can glean something useful from it for the sake of future research.

Sina

"...just be with me," Sina decides, snuggling into Nari's embrace with a clinginess that's only grown recently. "I need you, vhenan. In all ways. You are everything."

The lantern in their small shared space blurs in Nari's vision at Sina's request. Since the First had been born, there in their exiled forest home, it had been all she wanted to do; all she'd wanted to be.

"Bellanaris, da'halla," she says as evenly as the growing lump in her throat will allow. "To Skyhold, to Kirkwall, and someday to the Beyond as well." She chuckles wryly, the deep thrum of it vibrating where Sina's head sits snug against her chest. "You can't get rid of me so easily."

Sina smiles, a faint laugh through what quickly becomes tears. She hasn't talked to Nari about it, not yet, even though she suspects she knows.
She's dying, and there's no going back; there's no healing her, no miraculous solutions, even for the miracle baby. The words have yet to leave Sina's lips, because to say them is to admit that they're true, even when she knows deep inside that they are.
So instead of speaking further, she just breaks down, her tears seeping into the fabric of Nari's shirt, one too-thin hand curling over her own face to hide her eyes.

There aren't a lot of things that Nahariel can do, but she can do this; this arms encircling, this small hollow that will absorb the grief and not collapse. On her own, yes, she's drawn her knees to her chest and clutched them like a spar of wood in rough waters, weeping brokenly into the darkness created by her own body, but not here.

Here she is like a statue of Fen'Harel, facing the wilds outside their camp. Not the best defender, but the one who's there. Warmer than stone, but just as constant. There's not much pillow to the whipcord artisan but she manages to shift slightly in a way that will make the space more comfortable for the young woman in her arms, and she hums. She hums the way she whistles--meandering from tune to tune. Bits and snatches of songs from home thrum against Sina's cheek; and some from Skyhold, from chanted stories, Andrastian services, worker's songs, cradle songs, lays from travelling bards. Low and slow and constant, and as long as her clansister needs.

It lasts quite a while, Sina an endless font of pent-up misery. She's shed tears in front of others, but this is the first time she's truly broken down, openly admitted what she and likely others know to be true.
She cries herself to exhaustion, which, both blessedly and unfortunately, doesn't take long. Finally she falls asleep, her face still pinched in an expression of weary distress.

When Sina's breathing becomes slower and more even, her head dropping lower, Nari slowly and carefully alters her position, tugging a pillow in place to cradle her clansister's head a bit better. She curls around the small frail First as she'd sometimes done when they were younger, smoothing Sina's fine brown hair across her temples until the pained expression on her face relaxes. Only then does she settle her own head in the crook of her elbow and wait for her own sleep to come; which, with the warmth and slow breathing of the one she'd loved best since her birth against her chest, she does.

A hand is a lot better to fuck around with than a CHEST. If something happens, you can survive without a hand. You kinda need a chest to live!

[a few words are heavily crossed out] Do you need me to be the dumbass volunteer? I can't promise I won't punch him out though. Seems like it might be deserved.

Church

I know the risks.

If you volunteer I think the others will find it reassuring, even if we discover nothing-- it will be a step in the direction of understanding our common affliction. Having said that, the choice is entirely yours, I will not press you one way or the other.

Sina

I will come prepared then.

Do you know what specifically is involved? What specifically he's going to DO? Are there waivers to sign, do you have a ~~doc~~ healer on hand, just how prepared is this?

Church

I don't know, that's why it's research. I had planned to ask Anders to attend, but if you prefer someone else that's fine too.

What's a waiver?

Sina

Legal document saying you take responsibility for your own shit if you get hurt that sort of thing. I don't know if you guys have lawyers here. Not important.

Point is, before he does anything, he should tell you exactly what he's going to do in case you change your mind and tell him he can fuck off instead. There's 'research' and then there's 'reckless endangerment', in this case to yourself.

Church

I see. It sounds like a sensible custom, though it matters little in my case. I'm dying, Church. There's nothing Atticus will do that will change the fact.
If you still choose to volunteer, the others with shards in their hands will likely be grateful. My only aim is for my remaining days to be less painful, to see if anything can be done. If not, I only hope the rest of you are able to find a solution before your own afflictions can spread beyond recovery.

I'm sorry I had to tell you this. I would appreciate if you kept it between us.

Sina

Oh shit. Is it because of the one in your chest? Is it killing you faster? Shit I didn't know. That's fucking awful. There's nothing anyone can do? What if he's able to take it out of you?

Actually no screw that I want to make sure he doesn't hurt you. He can have my hand. Not like literally, I would still really like to keep my hand. But if he's going to be a Venatori fuckhead and do something awful just because he can, he'll have to deal with me first. I will knock all his teeth out of his head if I need to.

Church

Various reasons, none of which need detailing right now. There was perhaps something to be done, but we've long since passed that point, and anyone who may have been capable of doing anything has since gone away. Perhaps Solas or Adelaide will return someday, but I know better than to hope for it, and by now it would be too little, too late.

Your offer means so much to me. It will not be forgotten.

Sina

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(no subject)

Written response

Written response, in the usual hand of whoever scribes for Myr

written response

Written Response, Firm and Rushed Hand

at home

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I read your tag in Panera and it was a mistake

yes weep in public (I am doing it in private)

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