Just ASK next time, you guys...

[thecookery]

FORM: A note in somewhat crude handwriting
SENDER: Avery
RECIPIENT: Everyone
WHAT: A warning??
WHEN: Current
WHERE: Skyhold bulletin board
NOTES: n/a

ATTENTION

Whoever has been nicking from the preserves at night cut that right out or the next time youll get the entire pan

DIRECTLY TO THE NOSE

Everyone else if you have any information that leads to my bashing this thief about the face with a rolling pin there may be a reward in it for you

Either way youll find me in the kitchens i promise you that

--Avery

Comments

Sending Crystal]

[demonicbeauty]

[Ruh oh. Ariadne's been known to steal a bit of the food supplies, but always for a cause and certainly never for herself. For the refugees.]

I'm sure whoever it was was taking the food for very good reasons.

[thecookery]

[It takes a while for her to respond. Avery hates using this stupid crystal. It's not like people don't know where to find her if they really need to. Or better yet, they can decide not to bother at all.]

If they were dying and the only cure was plum jam, maybe they ought to have asked for it instead of skulking about in the dark.

Sending Crystal

[el_tybs]

[Perhaps it's the anger and threat of a pan to the face that's keeping people away. Even if they didn't do it]

That's... a bit extensive...

Have you considered setting a trap or staking out the kitchen?

[thecookery]

[It's not like she's ACTUALLY going to beat someone to death with a pan. It's called intimidation.]

Yeah, I'll get right on that after I finish with my normal duties and doing an extra count of the inventory and replacing what we're lower on now than we're meant to be. I'm sure I'll have plenty of free time left to play detective then.

Sending Crystal

[gatheringstorm]

I'm getting a little tired of the preserves running out when I want some, so I'll keep a look out. They won't want to be caught by me either, trust me.

[el_tybs]

[It's super effective.]

We can get someone else to set it up, I wasn't suggesting that you do it yourself necessarily.

Isn't there anyone in the kitchen or elsewhere helping you with all that?

[thecookery]

[Ugh. This is literally the most she's used her crystal in the entire time she's been in Skyhold. The struggle is real.]

Good. Maybe it'll set an example.

[gatheringstorm]

It'd better.

All I can say is that it's not Kas. I talked him out of pissing off kitchen staff, plus he's in Orlais.

[thecookery]

Course there is. Doesn't mean it's not still a lot of work. Do you have any idea how much food you lot go through?

[el_tybs]

Would it surprise you that I know? A lot of the staff come to the healers from time to time and you hear things.

[Or when he visits the kitchen from time to time to bake something without being in the way. He also knows about demanding jobs.]

Even a small army would make a lot of stress, and we're not exactly small anymore.

[thecookery]

Well, that's one down at least.

[thecookery]

Well, there you go then. Sounds like you get the idea.

[gatheringstorm]

...maybe someone did it for Asher. He's still in the healing tents and...well.

[Her voice softens for a moment, but then she clears her throat.]

I'll ask his crew.

[thecookery]

[Avery doesn't know the man, not by more than reputation, but if he's really that sick...

She sighs, irritated.]

If it was, just tell them to ask next time, yeah? Nobody's about to deny him a bit of bread and jam.

Crystal

[the_effect_she_has]

What if we're giving it to, ah, a worthy cause?

[gatheringstorm]

I will, promise. Just because it's for a good cause doesn't mean that manners have to be abandoned.

[If there's one thing she's learned, it's never to antagonize the people who make your food.]

[thecookery]

If it's that worthy, why wouldn't we-- [Yeah, she caught that.] --just let you have it if you asked?

[thecookery]

[A soft snort.]

If all the extra work these cheeky biters make on the daily was theirs to do instead of mine, I doubt they'd be trying it again.

[el_tybs]

So if it were me I'd hire someone who can make and setup traps.

By hire I mean bribe.

[Or would it be threaten in this case?]

[gatheringstorm]

That's not a bad idea, you know; conscript people for kitchen duty if they don't leave enough to go around.

[thecookery]

If I've got to. If they don't just listen.

[thecookery]

Yeah, well, if anybody catches one, maybe it can happen.

[dreadinquisitor]

[Gavin had been on his best behavior since his release, but Maxwell knew also how fond he was of goods from the kitchen. Lithe as he was, Maxwell wasn't certain the elf would be quick enough to escape Avery's wrath should she catch him in the act.

He'd heard she had a hell of a swing.]

If you do discover who it is, perhaps rather than beating them senseless, report them to me. I'm sure we can up with a suitable, less violent, punishment.

[el_tybs]

That would be good.

[Threats considered.]

What are they stealing again? Preserves?

[thecookery]

[Good! I mean, she isn't actually going to be beating anyone with a rolling pin, but if people really THINK she would, then maybe that will scare the thieves off.]

Do you have something in mind?