I think that you hold honour as a concept as if it is a thing in and of itself, ( she says, not unkindly. ) But to honour an obligation is not in and of itself a good or ill; it should depend upon the obligation. The contract that we make with one another here is one that I personally value; I agree that what you value, and therefore what you honour, are choices that remain yours to decide.

It is natural for one's values to change and grow, in time and with new knowledge. I know that the way to act with honour was used in my youth,

( she's in her mid thirties, )

I don't cleave to that meaning. But as a concept, the idea of honouring what one cares for, that is not inherently a wrong simply because many value harm.